Chuck Vs The Cardinal Rule Of Spies
by LittleCandyMan
Summary: Dark Chuck Fanfic. Takes place right after Season 2 episode "Chuck Vs. The Break Up." Chuck cannot hold in his emotion anymore. What if he gave up on being with Sarah? On everything? It is going to be a depressing ride. The story is finally completed!
1. Chuck Vs The Death of Emotion

**Takes place after Season 2 Episode 3 **_**Chuck Vs. The Break Up.**_** This is a dark story because I always loved the angst between Chuck and Sarah. Point of view of Chuck. Might possibly do one of Sarah, but we'll see.**

This is going to be a good day.

I walk outside the front door where Morgan is standing there, handing me a rose.

"I know you'll get her!" Morgan enthusiastically cheers me on. I take the rose happily as I keep walking with almost a bounce in my step. I see Devon and Ellie standing by the fountain of the courtyard.

"Remember! You're awesome!" Devon cheers me on. I look at him with pure satisfaction.

"That's my baby bro!" Ellie exclaims as I give her a look of preparedness.

"Today is going to be a good day indeed!" I say to myself as I walk to my car to drive to Sarah's hotel.

I arrive at Sarah Walker's hotel room with the rose in my left hand ready to hand it to her. I knock on the door and wait like a high-schooler waiting for his prom date. She opens the door. I hand her the rose with a smile on my face.

"Oh, thanks," she acts like the rose means nothing. "Good news!" She exclaims. "Now that you no longer have the Intersect, I am being reassigned!" My smile drops in a matter of milliseconds as she says this. "You get to live your life the way you want to now!" I am speechless. I don't know how she could just leave me. I finally get the Intersect out of my head and she is going to leave like I was nothing but a job?

"We'll never have to see each other again!" She happily explains as my heart just died. "Good luck!" She says cheerfully as she goes to shut the door. I am still in shock, speechless. "Oh, yea. I won't be needing this," she hands me the rose I just gave her like it was pointless. She then shuts the door in my face.

I am breathing heavily in a bed, lying in a puddle of sweat. I look around almost confused. I see the Tron poster to my left and the TV at my feet. I am in my room and in my bed. The clock says 4:36 am.

"Another nightmare?" I say to myself worried. "That is the third one this week. All about Sarah leaving me," I fear the worst in my campaign to be with Sarah. First I would see Bryce tell me she doesn't love me. Then I would see them making out like I was not even watching. Now it is her rejecting me personally. I cannot live like this any longer. I need to stop feeling emotions, but how?

The next day, I am sitting at the Nerd Herd desk, hoping for someone to ask me for help, for anything. I just keep thinking horrible thoughts. I can't stop thinking about what my life would be like if I never got the Intersect in me. I would probably still be at this job and no further in my five year plan.

What if Bryce never got me kicked out of Stanford? Then I would be a CIA agent; possibly met Sarah a different way. She would have still been with Bryce and my life wouldn't suck as much. I could let Ellie know all about my 'real' job. Life would be so much easier. Dammit Bryce! Why did you have to do that? You ruin everything that is possibly going for me.

Why doesn't anyone ever have a damn computer problem? I cannot take this anymore. I decide to walk up to get some water in the break room to relieve my stress.

I feel a little better. I sit back down and look around. Who is there to talk with? Morgan is with a costumer; Casey is, well, Casey; Jesse is not on shift today; Jeff and Lester? Are they the only ones around to talk with? I'll just fiddle with my pen until a costumer comes.

"Hey!" Sarah exclaims. I almost jump out of my seat. I look up to see her smiling. I try to return a smile but my fake smile falters. 'You ok?" She asks so sweetly. Does she care about me?

"I'm alright, just a bit bored," I reply half-heartedly. She can hear the pain in my voice.

"I got something to get your mind off things," she grabs my hand and starts to lead me out of the door. She can tell I am agitated about something. "We got a mission," she whispers into my ear. I think this may be a good thing. She is right; it will help me keep my mind off of things, as in her. We head for Castle for our debriefing.

The next few days go by. I barely make it through them. Every time I see Sarah, I recharge my patience of sitting at this dead-end job. A day later, we are in Castle getting an assignment from Beckman.

"Bartowski!" Beckman yells my name like a teacher whose student is not paying attention. I really wasn't paying attention. I was thinking of what it would be like to be dead. Does everything I know and think still exist? Or does it just vanish? How will the people around me react?

"Yes, General?" I look at her with no emotion.

"Do you understand the mission?" She starts to raise her voice.

"Yes." The transmission ends and I just go back to thinking about what happens when you die.

"Chuck?" Sarah calls my name. It breaks my trance immediately. I look up at her almost like a sick puppy dog. "Are you alright?" She seems worried but I know this is only because she needs to make sure I can function. "You don't look so good."

She is right. I don't look good. I have dark circles under my eyes because I haven't gotten much sleep since these nightmares have been happening and I don't think I can live without having her love. "I am fine, just a little tired," I say trying to be convincing but I don't really care anymore.

She knows something is wrong with me. I can see it in her eyes. She wants to ask me but I keep shutting her down.

We completed the mission successfully. I think this was the first time I stayed in the car. The next mission doesn't go through so well. Their were 'complications' that caused Sarah to get injured badly. She had to be taken to the hospital.

I hold her hand as she sleeps in the hospital bed. I never let go and just think of how awful I feel that this is somehow my fault.

We just had to capture a rogue CIA agent. We had the drop on him; at least we thought. Sarah seduced him and I had to watch. It was hard to see her with someone else. I shuddered at the sight and forced myself to watch. She did her job successfully and we captured the agent. We had him in the van but he escaped somehow. He charged a punch that was about to knock my head off as I closed my eyes in fear. She jumped in the way and took the punch. This punch didn't take her out; she is too strong for that. They fought quickly, throwing a few punches and kicks before the rogue agent pulled out a blade. Sarah didn't see it and I tried to warn her but it was too late. He stabbed her in the stomach and she immediately lost her will to fight. I cringed at the look of her falling to her knees. I attacked the man in fear and revenge. He just kicked me away and Casey finally shot him in the leg. We rushed Sarah to the hospital to make sure she was alright.

I wake up in the chair in Sarah's hospital room. I see her sleeping there peacefully. I don't want to wake her and instead just admire her beauty. After a few minutes, I see her eyelids flicker and she starts to wake up.

"How are you doing?" I ask softly hoping not to startle her. She slowly opens her eyes and looks at me confused. Her brow is furrowed, and her body shies away from me. "Are you alright? You took a nasty blow," I ask her now scared of her response to seeing me.

"Do-do I know you?" She looks very serious. This is not a joke at all.

"It's me, Chuck," I am now scared. Is this a side effect of the anesthesia? Did she somehow get brain damage from a stab wound to the stomach? That doesn't make any sense though.

"I don't know who you are. Get out of my room!" She yells at me as she gets out of the bed and looks at me horrified.

"Please calm down, don't you remember me?" I ask worried as I try to put my hand on her shoulder.

She hits my hand away and kicks me square in the stomach. I fall back at the power of it and I fall to the ground.

What the hell? I am in the hospital room and in the chair that I moved right next to Sarah's bed .Another damn nightmare! I need to control them! I look around feeling relieved that it was just a nightmare though. Has it been hours? Days? I don't know or care as long as Sarah is alright. My hand is in hers and I feel her hand tighten around mine. I feel her hand grip my fingers. I immediately look up at her face and she is already staring at me with those sapphire-blue eyes. She is smiling and looks into my eyes. I break the silence hoping this opportunity of me showing how much I care opens her up.

"How long have we been here?" this is a dumb question. I should have asked if she was feeling good.

"I think I should be asking you," she responds with the cutest, nicest response. Obviously she was the one who was injured and put under anesthesia. I was just sleep-deprived.

"How are you feeling?" I ask with the most concerned tone I could muster.

"Quite well! Thank you for staying with me. I have never had anyone do that for me," Sarah looks a little disappointed and I hold her hand tighter showing my love for her.

"No problem, you'd do the same," I say thinking that she would only do the same to make sure I am safe. Not because she loves me.

"Good job team," Beckman is satisfied with the mission outcome. I still don't really care. Beckman goes on about how the mission will help in the future and if Sarah was alright. I don't really pay much attention except for how Sarah responded to Beckman's questions. She says she is feeling good and she is ready for any mission. I look at her to see if she shows any gratitude to me when explaining to Beckman. She never glances at me but she looks at everywhere else in the room. Why can't she look at me? Did I do something wrong?

A few more days go by of me dealing with my dead-end job and having no sleep from all these nightmares. Each day I see Sarah, she shows hints of genuine care but she always says it is only for cover. It hurts more each time she does this. Maybe I should just end my life so this pain can end.

Every day, I am working at the Buy More. I fixed numerous peoples' cell phones and cameras. I don't really remember how many nor do I care. A woman walks up to the desk.

"My phone isn't working. You think you can fix it?" She asks in a joking manner. I take the phone and pull the back plate off.

"What is the problem?" I ask apathetically as I look up at her eyes. I see Sarah's beautiful eyes staring at me with a hint of worry but mostly confusion. She is probably thinking that I am not my cheery self, which is right.

"Oh, ha-ha. Real funny," I say pretty dully. She wants to ask me what is wrong so much. I hand her the phone and she clips the back plate back on.

"Want to get some lunch?" she asks almost like she actually wants to. That it isn't just a 'cover' thing.

"Sure," I answer indecisively. I think to myself, why not? I was just going to work through the lunch break anyways.

We are eating sandwiches outside the Orange-Orange. She looks at me with that same worry and confused look.

I ask her "How do you kill your emotions?" Her look intensifies. I don't really joke anymore. I stopped caring because it never got me anywhere. She is almost mortified by such a blunt question.

"You cannot get rid of your emotions," She carefully rephrases my question. "You need to control them."

"Yea, so how do you do that?" I ask seriously wondering how she can do it so well. I am dying inside, if not dead already.

"It is not easy. I cannot fully do it myself," she explains trying not to reveal anything. "This whole having lunch isn't just for our covers." I look at her hoping she says something about liking me. "I like being able to talk to someone too," she simply finishes her explanation.

Does she like any company? Or me specifically? I think this for a few seconds as I eat my food quickly. I don't think I can look at her knowing I will never be with her.

Sarah is concerned for Chuck and doesn't know what to do. She confronts Casey seeing if she isn't the only one who noticed Chuck's abnormalities.

"Is Chuck acting different? Or is it just me?" Sarah asks Casey in fear, worry, and curiosity.

"So… you've noticed," Casey agrees with Sarah although he is more nonchalant about it.

"Yea, he is more, um, gloomy, depressed—" Sarah starts listing things that Chuck shows reminisces of before Casey cuts her off.

"More dead?" Casey simply states.

"What?" Sarah is confused by the word 'dead.'

"He is dead inside."

"Yea, it seems like that," Sarah doesn't want to agree but it is true. Chuck is more dead inside.

"Maybe he got tired of all this and just shut himself off," Casey jokes scarily.

"I need to talk to him," Sarah expresses her concern for Chuck but doesn't want it to sound personal. "We need him to be in good health if he is going to flash." Casey just acknowledges her with a grunt.

Another nightmare, another day at work, another $11 an hour, another dozen people complaining their phones don't work. My shift is finally over. I can leave and loathe my pathetic life. As I make my exit with my head down, Sarah appears and sparks a conversation.

"Hey, Chuck!" She always has that sincere exclamation when she says my name. It just makes it hurt more.

"Hello," I say coldly to her without ever picking my head up to look at her.

She looks at me worried. I always looked right in her eyes; those beautiful sapphire eyes. I want to look at them so badly but it will just cause me more pain. "What is wrong?" She asks as she lifts my head so my eyes look at hers. Why does she have to do this? She has to cause me all this pain.

"Nothing," I deny anything is wrong although everything is wrong.

"I know there is something wrong," She won't give up that easily.

"I am fine," I try to put some emotion in it but there isn't really any left in me. I head for my car in the parking lot as Sarah stops me before I get to the car.

"There is something wrong with you. Tell me please," she pleads so sincerely like she really does care. It is just part of her mission to keep me functioning. She doesn't care for me at all. Not after Bryce came back.

I never thought a dead guy can ruin someone's life but apparently it is possible. Well, I guess he isn't dead anymore.

Should I tell her? I debate with myself. Should I open up and tell her everything? Will she just shut me down like she has done in the past? Is there a point in opening up?

"Seriously, I am fine," I insist but again I have no emotion to throw behind it. I get in my car and leave her standing in the parking lot all alone. I feel bad but I couldn't stand there any longer.

**I know this is a bit of a cliffhanger but just stick with it. I will have the end of the story up soon. Thank you for any reviews you may want to give.**


	2. Chuck Vs The Relief

**I forgot to say that I don't own Chuck no matter how much I wish.**

I decided to go to the beach to relax. I can try to sort out my thoughts. Maybe I should just swim as far away from the land as possible. I wonder how long I can swim for. I'll probably just end up drowning a few miles out. Would that be so bad? I think I need to tell Sarah how I feel but how? I can't just tell her everything at once. Maybe I'll start by asking if she has any real feelings for me. I'll tell her how I feel in an easy manner; one thing at a time. I can't overwhelm her with this. She has fragile emotions and I cannot afford to ruin it.

After an hour or two at the beach, Sarah sits next to me. I am a little startled but in too much pain to show it. I stay quiet as she thinks of what to say.

"I'm sorry but I kind of tracked you through the GPS in the watch," she tries to make it sound like she really wants to see if I am alright.

"I figured…" I respond lethargically.

She looks at me but I just stare off into the distance of the vast ocean. She turns my head gently towards her. She looks at me with an angry and worried face. "Please tell me what is wrong," she asks so sincerely, I almost melt. I cannot contain myself anymore. I need to tell her.

"Just some emotional stuff," I say dully. I don't want to burden her.

"You can tell me."

"No, I can't," I plead barely.

"You can tell me what's wrong," her thumb soothes my cheek with it. How can I deny such a beautiful face and such a sincere voice? Damn is she good at seduction.

"You want to know what is wrong?" I ask as if I am finally getting to what she wants to know.

"Yea," she says softly with a hint of concern in her voice.

"You are what's wrong!" I almost yell at her but I don't mean to. I have been holding it in for too long. She looks at me scared and confused. She is speechless.

"How do you do it? How?" I ask seriously but she looks at me with confusion.

"I love you Sarah. I know you know that. Casey knows that. I think everyone knows that!" I pour out my heart. "I cannot do this fake relationship anymore. I feel like everything I do for you is real but everything you do is fake! You told me nothing will happen while under that truth poison but I thought maybe you had feelings for me when we had that kiss, but I was wrong! You just didn't want to die alone and I was the only one there," I continue to express my feelings for her as she stands there deathly silent to let me finish my rant.

"Obviously you looked amazing in that dress! You always look amazing! Why do you even ask? It is hard enough for me to look at you without saying I love you and then Bryce, all high and mighty on his horse, just steals any chance I have of being with you!" Damn do I hate Bryce a lot.

"I cannot do this anymore! I can't pretend like we are in a relationship. That is just not me. You may be able to do it but I can't!" I feel like I am flailing my arms around in anger but not quite sure with all the pain and emotion I am letting out. "Do you know how much it hurts me to look at you knowing nothing will ever happen? You are the most beautiful girl in the world and I have to have a FAKE relationship with you? That isn't fair! I have to lie to all my friends of how great it is being with you when I haven't experienced anything real yet! I cannot do this anymore! I refuse to subject myself to such torture! I am literally dying inside! Just throw me in a bunker, I don't care anymore," I finish my rant with an apathetic response at the end. I am out of breath and I feel like it only took three seconds but it was actually minutes.

I look at Sarah, my breathing heavy. I am still angry. "You happy now?" I say in a hurtful way although I don't mean it, but I got caught in the moment. I look into her ocean blue eyes and I see the redness form around her irises. I see water drops slowly form around the inner corners of her eyes. I want to know what is going through her mind. Is she just going to blow me off? Is she going to fall in love with me? I don't care anymore. I know it is done.

She is still speechless. She is more paralyzed than anything else. A tear drops down her right cheek and I wipe it off. "I'm sorry," I couldn't think of anything better to say. I just dropped an emotional bomb on her and I don't know how she is going to take it. I start to freak out as she stands there in awkwardness.

Why did I do that? I ask myself in anger. I just screwed everything up! I put my hands over my head and thrash around a bit. I look at her and she still doesn't know what to say.

"Sarah?" I try to act sincere and loving. She doesn't answer me but looks into my eyes. I don't know what to do. I stand awkwardly for a second and then decide to hug her.

I open my arms to embrace her. She doesn't move at all so I reach around her and wrap my arms around her in fear and passion. Her arms slowly form to my back and I feel my shoulder dampen.

I think to myself just let it out. It is alright. I am here Sarah.

"I," Sarah starts to speak as I try to listen.

"I don't want you to live in a bunker," that is the first thing she says. I feel horrible after laying this on her.

"I don't either. I want to stay with you," I try to console her to make her feel better. I feel awkward as I have never been in this situation before. I still feel horrible for telling her all this at one time. I don't think anyone could handle it.

"I can't. I want to but I can't," She cries out while we are still hugging.

"Why not?" I ask not really wanting to know the reason. "It is ok, I will always be with you," I try to put as much emotion into what I am saying. "I will never leave you, no matter what!" I speak the truth.

"You don't want to care for me. I am broken," she sadly replies. I look her in the eyes and make sure she is looking back. I see her teary eyes and I want to make them stop crying.

"I am here to fix you! Let me get my toolbox," I joke hoping to get a rise out of her. She smiles slightly at my joke. I think this is the first joke I made in days. "You are not broken! You are perfect to me!" I cry out hoping she accepts me.

She rests her head against the nook of my neck and shoulder. I gently rub her cheek trying to make her feel better. I know she isn't good at expressing her feelings but I understand her. I know her well enough to not expect her to say I love you back when she does mean it.

She is the perfect woman for me. Opposites attract, right? I am a weak, book-smart, and a nerd; and she is a tough, well-trained, and a badass. I want this to work. No! I need this to work. I will make it work as long as she stays by me.

"Please smile," I plead softly. "Your smile can light a room, this beach, the world!" I exclaim throwing my arms out showing my emotion. I cup her face delicately and look into her eyes.

"I'm going to kiss you," I say softly as I bring my face to hers. She looks into my eyes showing acceptance. I kiss her gently on the lips. I feel her lips respond and I immediately start feeling better. I never want this moment to end.

After about another hour, I have my hand around her shoulders and holding her to me. She has been totally silent since I kissed her. I am afraid to say something else. I just want her to be alright now. I guess it is my turn to be scared for her.

"We should probably get some sleep," I whisper sincerely. I look at my watch and it is already 1:30 am. She doesn't respond and I don't want to get up until she is ready.

"Are you tired?" I ask, looking at her face. She is looking at the ground in front of her.

"Don't go," she says weakly. I still feel horrible for what I did but hearing her voice is helpful.

"I won't," I respond holding her a little tighter. We spent the rest of the night on the beach just enjoying the company and sorting the hectic night.

I wake up a few hours later lying on the beach. Sarah is next to me with her arms sprawled around me. I didn't have a nightmare in what feels like months. I relax thinking that I may have won her over. Maybe we can be together for real.

My phone assassinates the sound of waves crashing quietly. I quickly answer it hoping it won't wake Sarah up but it was too late. I look at the phone and see it is Ellie.

"Hello?" I ask a bit annoyed. I look at Sarah who at first looks confused to be waking up next to me but then just relaxes and puts her head back on my arm.

"You didn't come home last night," Ellie sounded worried and I needed to assure her everything was fine.

"I'm fine. Sarah had some computer problems and I crashed there," I quickly made up the lie. Being a spy helped me convince her easier. I can hear Ellie's excitement. I know she is thinking I got lucky or something like that.

"I was just checking in. I'll see when you get home." With that, Ellie hung up knowing she might be ruining a moment. She was kind of but it was okay. I hung up the phone and looked at Sarah, who was now staring up at me.

"Sorry about that," I stare into her eyes looking for forgiveness for waking her up.

"I want you to know that I really do enjoy being with you," Sarah sincerely explains.

"I know," I comfort her and agree to make her feel better. "I want to be with you for real and I think you want this too," I imply carefully not to overstep any boundaries.

"We're not allowed," she shudders.

"I don't care what this non-existent spy manual says about dating your handler, but I am ready to defy it," I try to act serious knowing what I said is humorous.

"I-uh—"

"Don't worry, I'll tell Beckman about it," I try to get some kind of acceptance from Sarah about this. I see it! In her smile! Right there! I embrace her in a hug and help her get up. I take her in my car back to my room to get some actual sleep in a comfortable bed.

This is going to be a good day.


	3. Chuck Vs The Dreamy Nightmare

**Because people want to know what happens next, I decided I'll write it. It may not be as awesome as the first 2 chapters (because they were so awesome; and I know I am boasting but what else can I do?). I will try to keep a lot of angst.**

* * *

I hear the birds chirping. Damn birds; they always make so much noise in the morning. I hesitantly glare at the clock to see it is 7:23 am. I feel nice and warm under my covers. My left side feels warmer than my right. I slowly turn my head to see why.

"What the…" I mutter as I see THE Sarah Walker smiling in her sleep. This is not a picture. This is actually her! Am I dreaming? Wait! Last night! Was that real or a dream? Oh no, it's going to turn into a nightmare, isn't it. This is the most vivid nightmare I ever had.

Wow, is she beautiful. This is the best start to a nightmare ever. She looks so adorable with the slight smile on her face. I wouldn't think badass CIA agent, Sarah Walker, could smile. Now I see why, because she smiles in her sleep, she doesn't smile during the day; that or being a spy and all. I really wish this wasn't a nightmare.

I need to tell her how I feel. If this nightmare of me telling her is any indication, then I need to tell her soon.

Some hair falls in front of her face and obstructs the beautiful view. I lightly move the hair out of the way. My hand brushes against her face as I move the hair. Her skin is softer than I could have ever expected. Wow, am I an imaginative dreamer.

"Wh…" Sarah groans softly. I quickly look at her as her eyes slowly open.

"Sarah?" I ask in disbelief that she is in the same bed as me.

"Chuck?" She sounds confused. I cannot blame her because I am just as confused. This is too vivid to be a dream or nightmare, but too impossible to be true.

"Did last night happen? Or was that just a dream?" I need to know what is going on.

"Yes, I believe so," Sarah says confidently as she looks at me. I look into her dreamy eyes; I am totally mesmerized.

"Awesome…" I mutter under my breath. It makes me think of Captain Awesome for a second but then get lost in Sarah's beauty again.

This is the best moment of my life. I need to do something to hold on to this moment forever. I hug her and smile. She accepts the hug and I feel so satisfied.

We only got like three hours of sleep and I feel like a million bucks. No, make that a billion because I am now with the girl of my dreams.

"What time is it? I can't really check with you hugging me," she jokes and it makes me feel even warmer inside.

"Sorry, about 7:30," I smile as I loosen my hug. I didn't want to let go of her. She smiles back.

"I am so happy that this is my day off," I admire her body and beauty. "I can just lie in bed with you forever."

"Good thing my job is non-existent. I mean no one ever gets frozen yogurt anyways."

"Hey, frozen yogurt is a respectable franchise," I coyly respond. She laughs as she nests her head in my chest. I embrace her with my arms around her back.

This is the best day of my life. I just repeat this in my head over and over.

**

* * *

**

I am still at home and with Sarah. We are scrunched up on the couch alone because Ellie and Awesome are working at the hospital. Sarah is explaining how she had really liked me from the moment she met me.

"I think the hottest thing you ever said was when you told me your phone was broken because you didn't get a call from me," I sincerely explained. She laughs so beautifully. She playfully elbows me.

"I thought it was pretty cute how you helped that father and his daughter with the whole ballerina situation," she looked at me with the most adorable face.

"I had my moments," I try to brag jokingly. She just bumps into me playfully as we enjoy each other's company. We are having a great time until my phone rings. I look at it and Casey's face shows.

"Looks like we have a mission," I say a little disappointed that we can't relax anymore. I answer the phone.

"What's up my good sir?" I sound cheery.

"Did you get with Walker? Or just laid last night?" Casey asks after hearing the happiness and contentment in my voice.

"What do you need?" I ask trying to change the subject, not knowing if I should tell Casey yet.

"Get over to Castle. We have a mission. I'll contact Walker."

"Uh—" He cut me off before I could even stutter.

"Spit it out Bartowski!"

"Sarah is with me," I try to act nonchalant about it but I can tell he thinks we got together.

"I didn't expect her to fall for a nerd," Casey actually has sounds of jealousy and praise in his voice.

"Wha-wait! How'd you know?" I am surprised he was able to put it together so easily.

"Just get to Castle now!" He hangs up the phone and Sarah looks at me expectantly.

"What did he say?" She knows it isn't going to be good after hearing my side of the conversation.

"I think he knows about us, you and me."

"Must have watched on the cameras," She sounded so confident and not phased by Casey knowing; almost like she didn't care.

"Well, we have a mission. We need to go to Castle." Sarah nods and gets ready as I get ready to go.

* * *

"I was just informed about a party that is taking place tonight that has an auction for illegal weapons." Beckman sounds like her normal cold self on the computer screen. "I need Bartowski and Walker to blend into the party and win the auction."

"What is my job for this mission?" Casey asks. I look at him and can tell he wants to tell Beckman about Sarah and I being together for real. Good thing we talked about letting Sarah and I tell Beckman ourselves. He is actually a pretty reasonable guy. Wow, I never thought I would think that about John Casey.

"You will be the auctioneer. Make sure they do there job correctly." Beckman answers Casey with no doubt in her voice.

"Does this mean we get to spend the government's money?' I quip feeling way better now that I am with Sarah.

Beckman narrows her eyes at me. "Yes, but it is only for the auction," Beckman stresses it almost like she is threatening us. "That is all. I will send you the details after this conference."

"Ma'am? Uh, General?" I ask nervously. Casey immediately knows what it is about and grunts as he leaves the room.

"What is it now, Bartowski?" Beckman sounds furious and this only makes it harder.

"Me and Sarah, Sarah and I, are dating, exclusively," I answer trying to sound serious but she still scares the hair off my back. I grab Sarah's hand immediately after.

"Release Agent Walker!" she threatens and I immediately drop my hand in fear of my life. She puts her head down and pinches her nose in frustration. "I knew this might be a problem with an untrained agent such as yourself." She insults me. "Walker, you will be re-assigned immediately before this gets too far out of hand." My heart just dropped. Not in a good way.

"No, General, ma'am! You can't do that," I complain and plead. I look at Sarah worried and heartbroken. She is in almost as much shock as me. I am hoping she stands up for our love like I am trying to do.

"You will have a new handler tomorrow. Walker, you'll come back to Washington until I can find a place for you," Beckman doesn't even think about our love or emotions. She doesn't care if we both want to be together.

I question if she has ever been in love or even liked another person. Why is it so bad to have spies fall in love?

"General, I would like to remain Chuck's handler," Sarah speaks up and it makes me feel better knowing she wants us to stay together too.

"That is an order!" Beckman stresses angrily and then ends the conference before Sarah or I could protest anymore.

My knees start to lose feeling and weaken. I drop into the chair behind me, barely making it on it. My head droops and my eyes start to tear up. I thought this was the best day of my life getting to be with Sarah, but it has all be stripped away like Bryce did to me at Stanford.

Sarah comes to my aid, making sure I am alright.

"It's alright, Chuck," she tries to reassure me but I don't believe her.

"It's not alright! Just when I finally get to feel real emotions with you, Beckman takes it all away! Why does the government want to ruin my life so much?" I almost yell at Sarah because I didn't know who else to get angry at.

"I'm sorry, I really am, but there isn't anything we can do," she expresses her concerns openly. She is as furious as me, but she can control it better. She wipes the tears coming from my eyes gently.

"We can't let them do this to us!" I cry out in agony and heartbreak. "We can run away!" I suggest not able to think of anything else in my traumatic state.

"They will always find us. It won't work. I am so sorry," she lays her head on my shoulder and I can feel her tears dampen my shirt.

Why does my life have to suck so much? First, Bryce gets me kicked out of Stanford; then Jill leaves me for Bryce; then he ruins my life again by giving me this Intersect. Now, I am forced to give up my relationship because I was thrown into this job that I didn't ask for. The only good thing is I got to meet the girl of my dreams, Sarah. But that is being taken away from me now.

If I cannot be with Sarah, then I cannot live. I know how corny it sounds being all 'Romeo and Juliet'-esque, but I really don't think I can keep living without her. Especially doing spy stuff that reminds me of her. She is the best part of this job and I already hate the job for making me lie to all my friends and family.

This IS a nightmare! It has to be for such a horrible thing happen. Please wake up, please wake up…

* * *

**I was wondering if I should bring a known character into the story or create my own. Please review with your ideas and/or choice. I am fueled by reviews and I feel like I am running on empty. Please take the thirty seconds to review if you have the patience to read my stories.**


	4. Chuck Vs Leaving On A Jet Plane

**I got some good reviews and it seems like they were thinking the same as me. Oh yea, I don't own Chuck. Sorry this took so long. I was busy the whole week.**

**/**

How can I do this mission with being such an emotional wreck? This is misery. I don't feel like discussing the mission. The last mission with Sarah.

"There is going to be many illegal arms dealers looking to get those weapons. We need you to flash on them and point them out to us so we can capture them," Casey explains the details of the mission,

"Why?" I say dreadfully as I slump in my chair looking at the ground. Casey grunts angrily and continues.

"You need to win the Bentley Continental GT, no matter what!" He stresses the last part making sure we understand.

"What's the point?" I say even more depressed.

"Snap out of it Bartowski! This is more important than your lady feelings!" Casey snaps at me and I look at him with empty eyes. I look at Sarah, who looks sad but expectant.

"I guess I can try," I reluctantly respond. Casey just grunts in annoyance as I look at Sarah to see how she is doing. Apparently she is doing way better. She is looking over possible suspects that will be at the party tonight. I stare for what seems like the last time I'll see her. She flashes a quick look of pain at me and then goes back to reading.

**/**

Sarah and I are walking up to the house to get into the party. I am in a black suit and a black tie and Sarah is in this beautiful red dress similar to the one she wore at the ball with Bryce not too long ago.

She fixes my tie and looks at me. "Are you ready?" She asks politely.

"No," I respond with a depressive response. I will never be ready to see Sarah for the last time.

"It's alright. Just relax and let the Intersect take over," her words of inspiration help me more than I expected.

"I'll try," I respond with a little bit of warmness in my voice. She smiles and grabs my hand as we step up to the stairs and enter the party.

The auction starts at 9 pm, so we have two hours to identify any suspects. After about thirty minutes, I still haven't flashed. I don't know what is wrong with me. I saw so many suspicious people. Like that guy right over there. He is standing in the corner surveying the party. He has a scar on his cheek, which is probably from a knife fight or something crazy like that.

"You flash yet?" Sarah asks nicely.

"No, I don't know what is wrong with me. It usually works so easily," I explain not knowing the reason.

"Is this the first time it hasn't worked?" Sarah asks concerned for me more than the mission, I hope.

"Yes!" I answer furiously. Maybe there is too much on my mind," I suggest knowing this whole never seeing Sarah again thing is probably the reason.

"I know it is hard. You weren't trained to control your emotions," Sarah consoles me as I start to feel more depressed. "This is our last mission together. I want it to be successful. Please, for me, can you do this one last thing?" I feel like she spills her heart out to me as her eyes start to tear. I want to do this for her. I need to calm down and flash.

I slow my breathing and look around. I see the man with the scar on his face. I focus immensely on him. My eyes start to twitch and I see the man's passport with his name on it, an order sheet with thousands of weapons on it, and a secret warehouse that holds all his illegal weapons.

"Whoa," I exhale as I look back at Sarah.

"Did you flash?" She asks expectantly and caring.

"Yea, on the guy in the corner there with that scar on his face," I point him out as inconspicuously as possible. "His name is Vladimir Ruskov, and he has a warehouse in that holds illegal weapons he bought from a Russian supplier."

"Did you get that Casey?" Sarah says through the microphone on her wrist. After a second or two, Sarah looks back at me and smiles. She steps onto her toes and kisses me on the lips. I am stunned for a second. Almost like all my worries are gone for that second. It is too bad I need to go back to reality.

I want to ask if that was for cover, because I did a good job, or because she loves me. I stop myself and just accept it as all three. It helps me feel a little better, but I am still in an emotional wreck.

"Anymore flashes?" She asks nicely. I look around trying to focus on each person's face. I see an Italian man with a dark blue suit on. My eyes twitch again and I start seeing all this information about him.

"Ugh, the Italian guy in that blue suit is Giovanni Enrico and he sells weapons on the black market. He is also a murderer," I whisper the last part into Sarah's ear almost like a child telling on someone.

"Great job, honey," she says happily to me and it makes me wonder if this is for cover or for real.

**/**

I was able to flash on a few more people, maybe two or three. The auction was starting in a few minutes and Sarah and I got good seats. If I wasn't so depressed, I would look forward to seeing Casey as an auctioneer.

"Hello ladies and gentlemen," Casey (the auctioneer) exclaims over the microphone. "What we have is a special auction for exotic cars!" Everyone claps softly. "These are from the private collection of the one and only, Richard Garrison!" Everyone claps louder. "Stand up and take the applause," Casey playfully suggests to Richard, who is sitting in the front corner. He stands up and bows. He sits down as the clapping fades.

I immediately flash as I see him. I learn that he got his money from a trust fund from his parents. He took over his father's company and revolutionized it with a new product. I learned almost everything about him, even his high-school grades. I finally snap out of it and Casey is already starting to auction the first car.

"The first car is a Pagani Zonda! The bidding will start at $200,000! Do I have any takers?"

**/**

After about four or five cars are auctioned off, Casey finally brings up the Bentley.

"Next we have a 2009 Bentley Continental GT. It is fully loaded with a state-of-the-art GPS navigation system, twenty-two inch chrome wheels, Gucci leather seats, everything! The bidding starts at $250,000! Do I hear 250?"

Someone raises their auction number and Casey acknowledges it. I look down at mine and it has the number 1 on it. All I could think is that 1 is the loneliest number and it is somehow mocking me. I think I have to have the worst luck ever. I zone out until Sarah nudges me and I look up to see what the price is at.

"Do I hear a 320? 320?" Casey exclaims. I raise my number and he points at me. "320! Do I hear 325? 325?"

After a few seconds, no one has raised their numbers and I wait in anticipation. "Going once! Going twice!" Casey starts counting. I think this was pretty easy to win. Maybe there aren't any guns in this car. "325! Do I hear 330?" I jump in shock to hear Casey's voice after thinking I won.

There is a three way bidding war between me, Giovanni, and Vladimir. After the price got up to about $400,000, I started to get annoyed. I want this to end so I could spend my last moments with Sarah before my life is shattered.

"500!" I yell jumping the price $100,000. Everyone gasps and I feel certain I won.

Barely a second later, I hear "$550!" I look back and see it was Giovanni. I kind of give him a stink eye as he looks like he is mocking me.

"How much money can I spend?" I ask Sarah with a whisper.

"As much as necessary, the bank account you were given has 1.5 million in it," she assures me I can win it.

"$600!" I exclaim. I hear everyone whispering to each other.

"Do we have $610?" Casey asks while looking around. "Going once. Going tw—"

"$650!" Giovanni yells out. I think that Vladimir is out of this war.

"650! Do I hear 660?" Casey hollers as if he actually cared. After a few seconds, he starts the countdown. "Going once. Going twice! S—"

"700!" I stand up in confidence and annoyance. Everyone gasps even louder. I even get some 'ohs' and 'ahs' from the other guests.

"700! Do I hear anymore?" Again Casey starts the countdown after a few seconds. "Going once. Going twice!" Another brief pause that kills me because of the anticipation. "Sold! To bidder number 1!"

Everyone claps loudly and I feel relieved. Sarah hugs my bicep and whispers to me, "I love you." For the third time, I don't know if this is because she actually loves me or I did a good a job on the mission.

**/**

We are in Castle after the successful mission. They acquired the weapons and arrested the other dealers. Beckman explains everything, but I don't care. All I could think about is how this is the last time I'll see Sarah. We are all still in our outfits from the mission but then again, I don't care.

"Walker, you'll be leaving Burbank tonight at 2300 hours. Agent Alex Forrest will be your replacement." Beckman explains and it is killing me inside. "Maybe, she can keep the asset in check," Beckman scolds Sarah for having emotions. I start to get very angry but the transmission ends before I lost my temper.

"Well, Walker, it was good working with you," Casey sincerely and professionally shakes her hand. She looks pretty devastated. She barely even shakes his hand as she looks down at the ground right after. I walk up to Sarah and hold her close.

I need to be strong although I cannot. I am in a whirl of pain and heartache. I wish we had more time together but there is only an hour or two.

"You want to help me pack?" She asks sadly.

"I want to do everything with you," I assure her in as meaningful way I could think of. She looks up to me and tries to smile through her depression. I walk with her out of Castle.

**/**

We arrive at her hotel room; I still have my suit and tie on. She doesn't have that much to pack. Mostly just knifes and handguns. We were almost deafly silent while packing except for me asking where things go. I saw the dress she wore the first date we had. The black dress with beige flowers on it. She looked so innocent in it and so beautiful. I thought my life was a fantasy to have met such an amazing woman. Too bad this fantasy is turning into a nightmare.

This is very hard for me to do. I keep seeing outfits from times when I saw her and they all bring back memories. "Is that the last of it?" I break the silence with a question.

"I think so," she unconfidently responds.

"I know it is hard for you to express emotions but I love you," I try to express my feelings. I hug her as I finish what I said. She embraces the hug and rests her head on my shoulder.

I don't really expect her to say anything else. We just bask in the moment for a few minutes. I never want to let go of her and I hope she feels the same.

"I love you too," I hear squeak out of her muffled mouth that is against my neck. This makes me feel so much worse inside because that means this separation is going to hurt her more, which hurts me to think about. I give you a kiss on the lips and sadly had to release it.

"We should probably go to the airport now," I say very depressed. She nods in agreement and I grab her bags and we head downstairs.

**/**

We arrive at the airport. Her car was already taken by the CIA to be transferred to Washington, so we took a taxi. It dropped us off and we went inside. We both looked very depressed as she checked her bags in and we had to say our final goodbyes.

I really didn't want to do this. It is going to kill me to see her leave. She walks up to me after checking her bags.

"Is there any way we can stay in contact?" I ask her desperately. "Maybe by calling or email?"

"I don't know. I can't promise you if they will let me. If I can, I will," she says worried and doubtful.

"I'm going to miss you," I really don't know what to say. What can I say? There is no way to describe what I am feeling right now.

"I'll miss you too. I think I may be able to talk to you until I get a new mission."

"This is so hard!" I complain letting the tears come out. She cannot help but start to cry too. "How am I supposed to just let the woman I love leave forever?"

"I don't know. Ask the government." She painfully says.

"And you told me you weren't funny," I try to joke but it is so difficult. She tries to smile but can only slightly form it. "Well, you're going to miss your plane," I struggle to say knowing how it means she needs to leave.

"You're right. I'm sorry," she apologizes but I don't think she has anything to be sorry about.

"You don't need to apologize. It isn't your fault."

"Somehow I feel it is," she almost cries again.

"It's not and I will always love you," I pour my heart out knowing I'll never see her again. I feel like I have nothing left to lose.

"You need to move on. You can't wait for me," she cries out letting the tears pour.

"I will! No matter what!" I will never forget her. She has changed my life.

"Please, I don't want to live with this burden," I think this is the first time I heard Sarah Walker plead or beg. This shows me how much she cares for me.

"I love you! Now go! Please!" I beg knowing I can barely stand seeing her leave.

"I, lo" she struggles to say.

"I know," I cut her off by kissing her on the lips. The last time I'll ever kiss Sarah Walker, the most beautiful girl in the world. I know how hard it is for her to say so I make it easier on her.

She slowly turns around with tears in her eyes. I can hardly watch as she walks away. I stand as strong as I can as I watch her walk into her gate and give one last look at me before she gets out of my sight. I turn around sadly with my tie undone around my neck and slumped as I walk back to get a taxi.

**/**

**I will try to get the next chapter sooner than this one took. I had a long-distance friend over for the week. Please review because it makes me feel better about my writings and self.**


	5. Chuck Vs The Zombie

**This story is going to get darker. I always loved the angst and I am keeping it up to the best of my abilities. Remember this is back in season 2 where Chuck has only the Intersect 1.0, so he can't fight or defend himself. He still works at the Buymore and still lives with Ellie and Awesome. Awesome doesn't know about Chuck, Sarah, or Casey being a spy yet.**

**/**

I lop myself on the couch and drop my head in depression. I turn the TV on and every channel reminds me of Sarah. I switch it to the music channel and it plays the song "One is the Loneliest Number." I quickly shut it off and lay on the couch. I am sick of everything now.

I wake up to a blender grinding through the quiet air. I barely react as I realize I am still on the couch. I don't remember my dream, if I had one. I stick my head up to see what the noise is.

"Whoa, dude, what are you doing on the couch?" Devon asks in an apologetic way.

"Nothing," I apathetically respond as I drag my way to my bedroom. I feel Devon's stare boring through the nothingness inside me, but I disregard it.

I plop myself on my bed and just lie there. I am too depressed to go under the blankets or take off my shoes. I am still wearing this suit from the mission. I feel like it is the only thing that helps me hold onto Sarah.

I think to myself that I need to meet my new handler. I just forget about it and try to sleep. I feel like I am crying myself to sleep, but there aren't any tears.

I awoke barely to hearing Ellie and Awesome talking about me. She sounds worried saying things along the lines of me sleeping so much and she doesn't know why.

Have you seen Chuck?" Ellie asks Devon worried.

"I saw him this morning. He slept on the couch and looked like hell," Devon explains trying to comfort Ellie.

"What happened?"

"I don't know. He just walked into his room. I haven't seen him since."

"I'm going to see if he is in there," Ellie explains as she slips her head into Chuck's room.

After a few seconds, she comes back out. "He is sleeping! In a suit!" She is astonished.

"It's already 4 pm. That is not awesome."

"Should we wake him?" Ellie is very concerned.

"Just let him sleep. He probably had a long night."

"What? Playing Call of Duty with Morgan?" Ellie is starting to get annoyed.

"Maybe something with Sarah," Devon suggests not sure what could make him sleep so late.

"Fine…" Ellie reluctantly agrees with Devon. I just shrug off the conversation and fall back asleep.

I wake up groggily. I look around and see the clock show 8:36 pm. "I just slept for twelve hours. Wow…" I think to myself that is a lot of sleep, but why am I so tired? I feel like I haven't slept in days. I realize I was supposed to meet my new handler six minutes ago, but I don't really care. I just try to go to sleep again.

"Bartowski!" A familiar female voice wakes me from my depressed coma. I try to ignore it.

"Bartowski!" The voice angrily yells again. I look around and see Beckman on my TV screen.

"Huh?" I reply without care or surprise.

"Why weren't you at Castle?" She pressures.

"Meh... I didn't really feel like it," I respond apathetically.

"You will follow my orders!" She furiously tells me. She is losing her patience.

"Why do you hate me?" I ask pathetically. I don't really feel like talking to anyone.

"I-uh. This is because I relocated Walker." I have never heard Beckman stutter before. I think she was stunned by my forceful question.

"What is wrong with us being together?" I put some emotion into my question. I can feel tears starting to form. I try to hold them back.

"It is a hazard to both of you. I am doing this to save you," Beckman tries to clarify her reasons. This just pisses me off because I don't feel very safe.

"I don't feel like talking. Can I just go back to sleep?" I ask not caring about her answer. She actually growls at me.

"You will meet Agent Forrest in your courtyard in twenty minutes!" Beckman orders and then ends the transmission before I could say anything.

**/**

I wait by the fountain. I am still in this damn suit. I see this tall woman with dirty blonde hair walking in. She is good-looking but nothing compared to Sarah. She introduces herself.

"Hello, I am agent Forrest. I will be your new handler," she has a cold tone to her voice.

"You know everything about me, I'm going to go back to sleep," I unenthusiastically say as I turn around and head for my apartment.

"Wait. We need to cover our bases as a couple," again her voice is quite cold. How can anyone like this woman as a real person? I think Ellie and Devon would hate her but bare her for me. I don't want to put them through that though.

"I met you at the yogurt shop and we have only been on one date," I apathetically say without turning back to look at her as I step into my apartment and close the door.

**/**

I wake up looking at the clock. It says 5:42 pm. I just think how I haven't eaten or had a drink in over a day. I used to always love food, up until Sarah left. "I can't just lie in bed forever," I unenthusiastically say to myself. I still have the damn suit on. My dress shoes are still on too. I drudge to the couch in the other room and start watching TV.

"Baby bro!" I hear Ellie exclaim loudly from the kitchen. "What are you doing today?" Something with Sarah? I haven't seen her in a little while. I haven't seen you either." Just hearing Sarah's name bores a whole in my now bruised heart.

"Sarah's gone," I mumble as I lay on the couch.

"What?" I don't think she heard me.

"Sarah is gone! It's all my fault!" I cry out pathetically.

"Did she dump you? I'll kill her for ruining your life!" Ellie quickly comes to my side to comfort me. I think to myself that Ellie would have no chance in a fight against Sarah. Ellie is now worried and angry that I may take a plunge like I did with Jill. I think this is worse though.

"No, her job stole her from me," I sadly explain, trying to hold the tears in. "She didn't do anything to hurt me." I want everyone to still think Sarah is a wonderful girl just in case she somehow comes back.

"What do you mean?" Ellie is now confused as much as she is sad for me.

"She got relocated. They made her take a job in another state."

"Why don't you go with her?" I can hear Ellie's voice crack. She doesn't want me to leave but if it makes me feel good, then she can live with it.

"I can't. I don't know where she is."

"I'm so sorry," Ellie hugs me strongly. "You want to go to dinner with Devon and I?" She asks not wanting to let me out of her sight.

"And be the third wheel?" I ask sarcastically. "No, I'll just make a hot pocket or something." I can hear Casey grunt contently in my imagination.

"You can't live like this. You need to get over her. I can't go through another Jill situation. Please get out of this funk and come back to me, Chuck," Ellie holds my face looking at her. She stares right into my eyes and then leaves.

**/**

I wake up on the couch. I guess I fell asleep again. I just sit up with my knees in my chest. The TV isn't even on, but I don't care.

Morgan comes out of no where and jumps onto the couch. "What up?" He exclaims. He sounds so happy and cheery, it makes me sick.

"Nothing," I answer depressed.

"You okay? Where's Sarah?" Ugh, it hurts so much to hear that name. He can totally tell how horrible I look. "You don't look too great." He studies my face. "You haven't been to work in a few days."

"What if?" I start to ask a question as I look at Morgan. "What if I was in the CIA?"

"What?" Morgan starts to laugh.

"If I had all these government secrets in my head…" I pretty much just told him I am in the CIA and that I have the Intersect.

"So you get to kill people with all these cool weapons?" Morgan plays along with it thinking it is a joke.

"Nope. No killing. Just staying in a car," I explain more detailed. I know this is strictly forbidden, but I don't care anymore.

All of a sudden, Casey barges through the front door. He grabs me by the arm and picks me up. "I know what will help him feel better," he explains to Morgan while looking at me angrily. I don't resist. I don't really care. Morgan just looks confused.

Casey takes me into his place and sits me at the table. He puts out a glass and fills it with some Johnny Walker Black.

"Drink this, moron," he pushes it into my face. I just think sure, why not. I gulp it down in a single swallow.

"For saying that to Morgan…" I apathetically guess that is why he is calling me a moron.

"No, because you fell in love with Walker!" Casey grunts. Dammit why does everyone have to bring her up? It hurts too much for me to hear her name. I am surprised that he actually wants to talk about "lady feelings."

"I'm sorry I can't control my emotions. I wasn't bred to be a killing machine like you," I explain with anger. He pours me another glass. I down that one too. He grunts as he pours me another.

"You need to man up! There is no room for lady feelings in this occupation!" Casey tries to console to the best of his abilities.

"You don't get it. She loved me! Me!" I grab Casey by the shoulders to express my love for her. "She wanted to be with me! I would have never thought I had a chance with someone so amazing." I start to ramble sadly, but with emotion behind my words. Casey grunts as I drink the cup of whiskey.

"Fix yourself up. Take a shower and shave," Casey orders me and pushes me out of his place. I look down and see I still have the suit on from the mission a few days ago.

**/**

I lie back on my bed to sulk. I am too depressed to take a shower or shave. I am starting to get some scruff on my chin, but I don't care. After a few minutes, Beckman appears on my TV.

"How did your meeting with Forrest go?" Beckman demands more than asks.

"Whatever," I barely even mumble.

"She is there to keep you safe!" Beckman growls at me.

"Well, I don't feel safe. I feel like I am in the most danger I have ever been in," I explain. I feel tears start to form under my eyes.

"What do you mean?" Beckman thinks someone might be stalking me or something along those lines.

"Well, that pen on that table is pretty sharp. Maybe those scissors there can slit my wrists cleanly," I just told her I am going to commit suicide.

She actually looks surprised as she quickly starts fiddling with her hands. "Do not even think about it! That is an order!" Her face disappears from the TV screen. I just lie back down, depressed.

About thirty seconds later, Casey steps into my bedroom furiously. He grabs me and drags me out my front door. Forrest is standing in the courtyard watching as my feet drag like dead limbs. I don't even put up a fight. I don't really care. I don't care about myself anymore.

**/**

The next thing I notice, I am lying on the floor in a bunker with a small prison cot and a toilet. I don't even realize what just happened. I just let them throw me into a bunker and I didn't even fight it. I don't even get off the floor. I just lay there numbly.

**/**

"General, Bartowski is not in any shape to be the Intersect," Casey explains to Beckman.

"We need him to work. You need to do whatever it takes," Beckman orders.

"I believe bringing Walker back and letting them pursue their relationship is the best way," Casey actually cringes a little.

"I will not allow my agents to fraternize!" Beckman growls at Casey.

"I understand ma'am. We will do what we can," Casey is annoyed that his idea got shot down but knows not to talk back to a general. The transmission ends and Casey has to try to think of something.

**/**

"Food!" I hear someone yell as a plate of marginal food slides under the door. There are also some pills I think they expect me to take. I don't eat the food or take the pills. They always have to check on me an hour later to see if I have eaten. Then they always have to force feed me the food and pills. I don't resist, it is just I don't feel like putting the food in my mouth myself. I feel like a zombie void of emotion or personality.

Hours or days go by. I don't really know because nothing happens and my mind just keeps thinking of Sarah. It hurts every time but I cannot help it. Some people come in once in a while to try to get me to flash. It never works. I just lay there lifeless the whole time. They keep trying to give me food and pills. They make me take them, although they don't really change anything. I just feel drugged out and go into an even worse state of depression. I haven't dreamt since Sarah left. It has been at least a week since then and I feel worse. I just hope she is doing better than me.

I try to imagine what Sarah is doing right now; probably on some secret spy mission, doing spy stuff. Maybe shooting someone while throwing a knife at another. She was always so amazing. Maybe her new partner is someone who she likes, maybe Carina. They always seemed to like each other. Maybe Sarah found a new boyfriend. The thought kills me, but I want her to be happy no matter what.

**/**

They enrolled me into some special training program. Mostly to take psychological tests that will change me into a real spy. They are trying many methods. I feel like I am too far gone to do anything.


	6. Chuck Vs The Machine

**I obviously don't own Chuck or any name brands I may use in my writings.**

**/**

"This is a simple Rorschach test. Just tell me what you see," a shady doctor tells me while I am strapped into a chair.

I don't even give any sign that I accept what he says. He shows me an ink blot on a piece of paper. I look at it and immediately think of Sarah.

I see her beautiful hair flowing across her face. There are explosions and madness behind her, but all that doesn't matter because she is there.

"I saw a cute, little dog," I lie to his face because I don't want to do this. I don't care about some stupid test.

The doctor rolls his eyes and continues with another card. I look at the ink and think of Ellie worrying immensely about me because she hasn't seen me in a few days.

"A flower in the wind," I lie, making it obvious on purpose. I know I am annoying this doctor and I don't care.

The doctor grunts and reluctantly continues. He shows me a third card. I start seeing chaos.

I look around horrified to see my house in Echo Park in a blazing ruin. I see Ellie and Devon's house totally destroyed. I see Casey bleeding out on the ground in front of me. I am scared out of my mind. I look down and see Sarah in my hands. She is cut and bruised. She looks up at me very sorrowfully.

"I'm sorry," she chokes on the blood in her mouth before she dies in my hands. I feel the worst pain ever. My heart is shattered and my life is over.

I look at Casey frightened for my life. "This is all your fault! If only you flashed! If only you flashed…" Casey exhales as he drops to the ground lifeless.

"What did you see?" The doctor asks. He wakes me from the horrible vision. I think of how I could have jeopardized them if I didn't flash. "Well?"

"Uh, a, um, burning building," I couldn't tell him what I saw exactly.

"Hmm…" The doctor ponders for a minute. I know that this has no relation to my previous responses, so it obviously means something to him.

"Well, that will be all Agent Bartowski," the doctor stands up and removes himself from the room. I just think that I am hardly an agent. I sit there for a few minutes waiting for whatever is next. I don't really care. Casey and Forrest walk in.

"I always knew you were sad, but this is just pathetic, Bartowski," Casey insults me in a laughing manner. He thinks I am an idiot for falling in love, like I deserve this punishment. I didn't ask for this damn Intersect. I didn't want to be part of the CIA or NSA or whatever I am.

"Snap out of it! We need your help," Casey orders me. I look at him with death-filled eyes. "Walker doesn't love you! This is life and you need to get over it!" Such encouraging words from the big guy. I think this sarcastically.

"I just don't get it," I drop my head in depression. "Why does the government want to ruin my life so much?" I ask in a depressed mood. I haven't been happy since the morning after I got to be with Sarah for real. Wait! He said she doesn't love me? "What do you mean she doesn't love me?"

"She never fell for you. It was just to make sure you can flash properly," Casey explains. I look at him in anger thinking how dare you say something so absurd and offensive.

"You're lying!" I yell in pain and anguish.

"Watch…" Casey says almost expectantly. I look in contempt at what he means. The door to the interrogation room, or whatever it is, opens. Sarah walks through the door. She looks very modest and conservative. Her hands are crossed against her waist and she stands next to Casey.

"Sarah?" I am stunned. "What are you doing here?" She isn't smiling at all. She actually looks a little sad, but not enough for me to make an assumption.

"I was told you wouldn't cooperate until you got the story straight," I feel like this is not going a good way. She doesn't sound like the Sarah I remember. She seems so proper and distinct.

"What do you mean?" I ask in fear. I don't know if I want to hear this.

"My mission was to make sure you can flash successfully. I needed to make you're your emotions were in check so you can flash on cue." She explains coldly. Who is this imposter? This cannot be Sarah.

"No, that's not true. I love you! You love me!" I know how pathetic I sound. I can just imagine Casey laughing on the inside, but I don't care.

"I'm sorry I misled you. I made a rash decision that I now regret. It was just a mission and that is it," she explains with ice in her voice. This is horrible. How can she do such a horrible thing to someone? What did I do to deserve this?

"No, please!" I plead not able to move. Now I know why I am strapped to this chair. Sarah turns around and walks to the door. She stops for a second and then continues out of the room. My heart has just been shattered, murdered, destroyed, etc.

Everyone leaves the room to leave me with my thoughts. I don't know what to do. I think about becoming an emotionally-absent person like Casey or Forrest. I have no emotion, no personality, and no imagination. I am never opening my heart again. I have to shut down completely. Become a new person. A person that only does what is told and never deviates from the plan. I have to become a machine.

**/**

I am back in the bunker. I am standing there doing nothing. Casey and Forrest walk in and look at me. I am like a zombie; devoid of emotion.

"We need you to flash on something," Casey says as he pushes a folder into my stomach. I take the folders and open them. I immediately flash on the first page. I flash on the second page. I have never flashed so easily before.

"This Kilborn guy is an assassin. He is in town for a big hit." I express with no trouble at all.

"Sounds like my kind of mission," Casey and Forrest say in unison. They both look at each other and grunt in satisfaction.

"Is that all you need from the human computer?" I say seriously without any emotion or comical sense.

"Now, was that so hard?" Casey asks in a rhetorical sense.

"You will resume your cover job immediately," Forrest adds as they both believe I'm able to do my job successfully. This is the part I would usually beg to go on the mission with them, but that isn't what my orders are.

"Yes, Agent Forrest," I properly accept and they escort me out of the bunker, back to Burbank.

**/**

I step into the Buymore looking around. I haven't seen it in sometime. Everything looks the same. The Nerd Herd desk is still there, waiting for me.

"Charles, take a vacation with blondie?" Lester blocks my path from the Nerd Herd desk.

"No. She and I are no more," I state dully.

"So blondie is open for business?"

"Sure, why not."

"This is destiny," Jeff butts in.

"Yes it is, Jeff. Watch how the master works," Lester brags as he leaves the Buymore to try to be with Sarah. I just shrug it off, not really caring.

"Dude! You're back!" Morgan exclaims just as I get to the Nerd Herd desk.

"Yea." My responses are dull and direct. I don't feel the need to beat around the bush.

"Want to play Call of Duty tonight?"

"No."

"What? The Chuck I know never turns down Call of Duty! What is wrong?"

"Nothing."

"No, really. I'm your best friend. You can tell me anything."

"I'm fine."

"Did Sarah dump you?"

"Yea."

"Who cares… You're too good for her," Morgan tries to comfort me, but he is definitely wrong. There is no girl better than Sarah.

"Where's blondie?" Lester asks out of breath. He looks surprised and shocked.

"She is gone," I state simply without any sign of me liking her.

"That new woman is a major ice queen," Lester warns everyone.

"So you met my new girlfriend," I explain without showing I am happy or sad about it.

"What has she done to you?" Morgan starts examining my face closely.

"Nothing. She is a smart person," I barely even defend her. If she was my actual girlfriend, I might actually try to defend her.

"I wouldn't want to be with that broad," Lester gives a sign that I can have her.

"How's the sex?" Jeff butts in.

"It must be rough. She's into that sick stuff like torture and such, huh," Lester provides the eccentric images in everyone's heads.

"No, I just met her. We've only been on a few dates," I supply the false information to get everyone off my back.

"You'll see, Charles," Lester says his goodbye in an odd way. "Lets go Jeff." He acts like Jeff is an animal or pet.

**/**

Castle is a very creepy place. There are so many niches and tunnels. I always feel like I am being watched. I'm just waiting patiently for Casey and Forrest to get back from the mission.

They walk into Castle through Orange Orange. They step in and look a little tired.

"What are you doing in here, Bartowski?" Casey asks.

"Waiting for my next order, Agent Casey," I simply state. I think Casey actually flashed a sign of fear and worry. I never call him agent.

"You can go home," Forrest explains. "There is no information that we need you to flash on." Once again, I feel like I am treated like a computer. Casey looks at me weird. He senses something wrong with me, but what isn't wrong?

I head for the door out of Orange Orange. As I get to the door I overhear Casey and Forrest talking.

"Mission successful," Casey and Forrest say in unison. That is just creepy. Are they related or something? I leave to go home to live my fake life. I feel like my life has been switched. Before, being a spy was my fake life. Now it feels like my real life. Ellie is my fake sister. Devon is her fake boyfriend. Morgan is just a fake friend.

**/**

"Chuck!" I hear Ellie scream my name as I walk into the front door of our home. "Where have you been?"

"At work…" I'm not quite sure what she means.

"You've been gone for six days now."

"Oh, yea. I left to get Sarah out of my head," I lied, although it wasn't really a lie because I did get her out of my head. "I'm tired. I'm going to go to sleep. See you tomorrow, sis." With that, I walk into my room with beady eyes judging and examining me.

**/**

A very enraged, livid, annoyed Sarah Walker is standing before General Beckman.

"How could you make me do that!" She is filled with rage.

"It was necessary. He flashed for the first time in days," Beckman defends her decision.

"You ruined his life! He isn't a spy! He's a civilian that didn't ask for this!" Sarah is relentless about the pain she caused Chuck, along with the pain Beckman and the government caused him.

"We ruined one life to save thousands. It is a sacrifice that had to be done."

"Did you see what he looks like? He is dead inside!" Sarah is now filled with pain and sadness along with the rage.

"I'm sorry you feel this way about my decision, but it's not your decision to make," Beckman stays persistent.

"If you would just let us be together, then I wouldn't have had to lie to him!" Sarah is pissed. She is about to rip Beckman's head off.

"I did what had to be done to preserve the security of this nation."

"Ugh, I'm taking time off. I can't deal with this!" Sarah storms out of the office. Beckman is frustrated but still believes she did the right thing. She worries about what Sarah might do, but feels she has more pressing matters to attend to.

**/**

It's been a few days of me doing exactly what I'm told. There haven't been any missions yet. I had to go on a cover date with Forrest. I can't even bare to call her by her first name, Alex. I only do it to procure our cover. She doesn't talk much. She is all business, no fun. That is fine with me… now.

**/**

Sarah Walker is waiting impatiently in her uncomfortable commercial class seat as the plane touches the ground. She hears the pilot over the com system, "Welcome to Los Angeles and thank you for flying with us."

**/**

"Yogurt time," Casey hits me in the stomach. It barely fazes me as I swiftly follow him to Orange Orange.

"Our mission is to recover a stolen data file," Forrest explains.

"We need you to flash on the compound," Casey drops a blueprint on the table. I focus my sight on the blueprint. Nothing happens.

"There is no information in the intersect about the compound," I sound like a computer explaining its result from computing something.

"How about on this man?" Casey drops another file on the desk. I focus on the man. My eyes roll back and twitch. I see a Fulcrum badge with his face on it. I see his importance to Fulcrum.

"He is a Fulcrum agent," I inform Casey and Forrest, "he is one of the head operatives."

"Good job. We will need your help on this mission," Casey reluctantly asks.

"What do you need?" My voice is consistent and conservative. That is how my voice has sounded since what happened. I don't really want to talk about it.

"We need surveillance coverage in the compound," Forrest explains clearly.

"We leave in ten," Casey throws a bag of spy tools onto the table.

**/**

Sarah steps into the airport terminal. She looks around to take in the sight of the LAX terminal. She says to herself, "Please be the same Chuck I fell in love with. Please still be Chuck, my Chuck."

**/**

**Just stick with it. Sarah is making a comeback of sorts. I know it has only been Chuck lately, but I'm getting to it. Please review, it makes me feel better about my horrific writing. Feel free to tell me my writing is horrific. Just kidding, but seriously.**


	7. Chuck Vs The Girl

**I hope you are liking the story so far. It is coming to an end, sadly. I will try to make it end with a bang, but we'll see.**

**/**

I am in the packed surveillance van. There are six monitors that all have feeds from the security cameras in the compound. I am leading Casey and Forrest through successfully.

"There are three guards in the kitchen," I inform Casey and Forrest through the earpieces.

Casey puts a bullet in one from his silenced pistol and beats down another. Forrest takes out the third one at the same time with a well-timed choke hold. All three are taken out silently. This is where I should be making wooing noises but that isn't me anymore.

"There are two guards outside the office," I see two men through the security feed.

Casey and Forrest synchronize their bullet shots to ake out both men at the same exact time. Both men fall dead.

"He is in the office. He looks oblivious to your presence," that doesn't sound like anything I would say. Casey is probably thinking where are the moronic words I used to use or the sounds of amazement I make when they take enemies out.

They charge the room and arrest Mills successfully. I think this was the most simply accomplished mission I have ever been a part of.

**/**

Sarah is standing outside Chuck's Echo Park complex petrified and worried. She doesn't know what to say to Chuck. She knows she needs to apologize first. Then tell him she was forced to lie and she still loves him. She is pacing back and forth thinking of the best way to confront Chuck. She thinks to herself, "Why is this so hard to do? It is so simple. Chuck used to be so easy to talk to. He always wanted to listen as if it was his business, although it was more of a burden to him. Oh, how I miss Chuck so much. Even if he thought we were just partners. He always made things more fun. He has a great group of friends and family that meant so much to her. Why don't I just tell Chuck all this when I see him. I hope everyone doesn't hate me for leaving." Sarah continues to pace back and forth.

**/**

"Are you okay, Bartowski?" Casey asks noticing the lifeless machine I have become.

I am standing with my back straight with perfect posture inside Castle. "I am fine for what is expected from me."

"I actually miss the old you. At least you kept things interesting," this is the first human feelings I think I have ever seen Casey show. "If you tell anyone, I'll kill you!" He threatens knowing he just shared some personal information. "That goes for you too, Forrest!" Casey needs to cover his bases. Forrest agrees with a nod.

"I will not release the information without your permission," I professionally agree to his threat.

"There you go again. You would have made a joke about my getting soft," Casey can see the change they forced on me. That chapter, well more of an act, is the past. This is who I am now, all that old stuff was left behind when they showed me the light.

"That would be unprofessional. I am now here for the safety of this nation," This is me now. It doesn't hurt inside to think about my old life. I can barely remember it now.

Casey looks at me confused. He would ask what happened, but he knows. He was an accomplice to the transformation of me. No more Mr. nice spy, huh?

**/**

"It is now or never," Sarah tells herself. She stops pacing around, her vision tunnels to only see Chuck's door, and darts her way towards Chuck's apartment. She knocks on the door and tries to hold the tears back until she sees Chuck.

She waits patiently for only about ten seconds, although it felt like forever. Ellie opens the door with a gasp on her face. She is shocked at the sight of Sarah.

"Hello, Ellie. Is Chuck there? I really need to talk to him," Sarah tries to be as sincere as possible.

Ellie wraps her arms around Sarah. Sarah is in awe and not sure what to do. "Thank god you came back. Chuck hasn't been himself since you left," Ellie is bursting with happiness and expectancy.

"That's why I'm here," Sarah gladly replies knowing how much it means to Ellie and Devon.

"Awesome!" Devon yells from behind the kitchen counter.

"You can join us for dinner!" Ellie is so joyful that Sarah is back to save Chuck.

**/**

"Good job, team," Beckman congratulates us on the successful mission.

"You have shown great strides, Bartowski," Beckman compliments me, but I am too professional to acknowledge it with more than a nod of my head.

"This will cripple Fulcrum and delay their attempts at making a new intersect." Beckman looks content and ends the transmission.

My phone rings and startles everyone. I take it out of my pocket and see Ellie's cheerful picture on it. She is smiling and looks so happy. I answer the phone with a simple, "Hello?"

"Chuck? It's me Ellie." She can hear the plainness of my voice.

"Yes. What do you need?" I ask bluntly as if it is a mission.

"Will you be here for dinner?" She asks almost like a demand.

"Yes, I can do that. Should I bring Alex?" I ask thinking how odd it sounds to say Alex instead of Agent Forrest.

"Who is Alex?" Ellie sounds confused and lost.

"She is my girlfriend. You haven't met her yet," I explain devoid of cheerfulness that I have a girl I like, although I don't actually like her in that way.

"What? Uh, no! Come alone," Ellie stutters at the surprise, but recovers calmly.

"Alright, I will be there in twenty minutes," I respond with the same consistent voice.

"I have a surprise for you," Ellie sounds giddy and jovial. I hang up the phone and look at Casey and Forrest. They both have expectant looks on their faces.

"Ellie wants me to have dinner with just her and Devon," I explain to catch everyone up on my new mission. I shouldn't think of this as a mission, but this is how I think now.

"I think we are done here. Bartowski! You get yourself together. I'm going to clean my guns," Casey says his farewells for the night without saying the words goodbye, bye, see you, or any form of those.

"I think I will join you," Forrest butts in and follows Casey. Casey grunts contentedly. These two are exactly the same person except for different chromosomes. I leave Castle to see what Ellie needs.

**/**

"You need to fix Chuck!" Ellie pleads to Sarah. "He is like a robot that eats, sleeps, and works!"

"I want to fix him. He fixed me when I was broken. Now it is my turn to return the favor!" Sarah thinks of the night on the beach that Chuck opened up to her, one of the greatest parts of her life.

"Chuck has been very down lately. I think he needs you," Devon throws this in the conversation.

"We need to make you look amazing," Ellie examines Sarah's jumpsuit, which doesn't show her curves well, but she can still wear the shit out of it.

"I don't really have any clothes here," Sarah confesses although she would love to wear something nicer.

"Come with me," Ellie stands up off the couch as Sarah follows her. "I think I have some dresses that may fit."

"This is going to be awesome!" Devon exclaims knowing Chuck is going to get one hell of a kick out of seeing Sarah and maybe get out of his depressive stage.

**/**

I am just outside my apartment complex. I walk up towards the fountain.

"Chuck!" Morgan appears from behind the bushes.

"I'm sorry, I cannot talk right now. Ellie expects me for dinner," I respond coldly.

"Dude! Come on! You're making me depressed!" Morgan starts to explain because I have been so cold and lifeless lately. "I feel more depressed that you are actually making me depressed!"

"I'm sorry, but I need to go," I don't even acknowledge his plea for help. I try to walk by him, but he blocks my path.

"Dude! Can I at least come over for dinner?" He tries to put a puppy-dog look on his face.

"I am sorry, but Ellie told me to come alone," I don't even give any sign of forgiveness in my voice. He looks down a little depressed, but tries not to show it.

"I'll catch you on the flipside," Morgan steps out of my way and leaves. I think that I can now finally finish my mission of having dinner with Ellie.

**/**

"This is perfect!" Ellie exclaims with giddy joy. She is holding an elegant, beautiful blue cocktail dress.

"That looks amazing. Are you sure I can wear it?" Sarah was never confident in her looks, which is why she asked how she looked and never tries to act over-sexual when not on a mission.

"YES!" Ellie almost forces Sarah to wear it. "I want my brother back and I'll do anything to get him back," Ellie confesses to Sarah. Sarah nervously thinks how she will greet Chuck.

Sarah slips on the dress while Ellie has her back turned. After adjusting the dress to her form, she looks at Ellie and asks, "How do I look?"

Ellie turns around and her jaw drops at the beauty that stands before her. "You look amazing…" Ellie can barely speak.

Sarah sighs in content with Ellie's look and response.

"We just need a tint of lipstick and you'll be perfect. I may even have to keep you away from Devon," Ellie jokes to make Sarah feel more confident.

"Don't worry," Sarah chuckles, "Chuck is the only one for me," Sarah assures Ellie although she knew it was a joke.

Ellie lets out a little squee as she hugs Sarah vigorously with happiness. Sarah accepts it knowing how happy she is making Ellie for coming back for Chuck.

They walk back into the living room, ready for dinner. Ellie helps Devon finish preparing the food as Sarah waits patiently thinking of what to say when she sees Chuck.

**/**

Well, my mission is just about complete all I have to do is open the door and it is accomplished. I slide the key into the keyhole.

**/**

Sarah hears the lock slide into the door. She readies herself.

**/**

I pull the key out after unlocking the door. I put my hand on the door knob and push the door open calmly.

I survey the room. I see Ellie putting the final touches on the table set. I see a beautiful blonde woman sitting, facing the door. I see Devon standing in the kitchen holding a wine bottle.

I walk in and put my bag in the corner. I look Sarah in the eyes. She looks like she is about to melt. "Hello, Miss Walker," I simply greet her like I barely know her. Everyone halts their actions and look in surprise and disgust. I have never ever called her Miss or by her last name. The truth is that I wanted to call her Agent Walker but that would ruin our covers. I continue like nothing happened. I sit at the table. "Hello Ellie. What is for dinner? Hello Devon," I barely acknowledge the eccentricity that is in the room. I used to always call him Awesome or Captain, but never Devon; until now.

"Chuck?" Sarah asks quietly and concerned.

"Yes?" I act like there is nothing between us.

"It's me, Sarah," she sounds so worried.

"Yes, I know."

"What did they do to you? What did I do to you?" Her eyes start to run with tears. She looks like her heart just shattered.

"I now know my purpose" I state with no sadness or emotion in my voice.

"Chuck! It's Sarah!" Ellie joins in on the intervention. I am fine. There is nothing wrong with me. I fixed any flaws I used to have like emotions and feelings.

"I know. So, what's for dinner?" Ellie looks at me furiously. I can see I am doing something wrong, but I don't feel it is wrong.

Sarah grabs my arm and pulls me out of the front door. She takes me outside where we are alone. "What did they do?" She cries out, examining my face closely. "This is all my fault!" She cries out as she lays her forehead against my chest.

"I am fine, Agent Walker," I reply calmly. She looks up at me mortified. Her eyes are bloodshot red. I've never called her Agent Walker before.

"I didn't mean what I told you earlier. I do love you!" She said it so fluidly and easily. "I was forced to lie! I want to be with you!"

"You are compromising yourself, Agent Walker," I don't even acknowledge she just said that she loves me.

"Come back to me, Chuck. Please…" She pleads softly knowing what she did to me.

"Spies don't say please," I explain coldly. She looks petrified at the horrible transformation I went through. "You are acting unprofessional right now. What is your current mission?"

"Walker! Get over here!" Casey calls Sarah over. He probably saw her on the camera bugs littered throughout the complex. She walks over to him to talk. I stand outside my door patiently, waiting for their conversation to end.

**/**

"This is quite pathetic Walker. I can see him crying over you, but not the other way around," Casey couldn't help but to scorn her.

"What did I do to him?" Sarah asks fearfully, shrugging off Casey's comment.

"He shut himself down after you told him you didn't love him," Casey explains with a hint of sadness in his voice. "The only thing left in him is the Intersect."

"How could you let me do this?" Sarah starts to get angry.

**/**

I can barely overhear their conversation. I overhear pieces of the conversation; mostly Sarah yelling in anger. I just disregard it as I am not meant to be in the conversation.

**/**

"My mission was to get him to flash and it worked," Casey defends his motives.

"He was an innocent civilian! He actually thought of you as a friend!" Sarah yells at Casey. Casey knows he deserves it and lets her sink her teeth into him. "He invited you to all those dinners. He felt sorry for you! This is how you repay him? By ruining his sanctity?" she finishes her rant sarcastically.

Casey thinks to himself for a second while Sarah recovers her composure. Casey isn't someone who apologizes for anything. "I did what was necessary, no matter how inhumane," Sarah narrows her eyes at Casey. "I regret my decision."

"He isn't even a shell of himself anymore! I'm going to get our Chuck back," she looks fully determined, "if it is the last thing I do!"

Casey acknowledges her with a grunt and the closest thing to a smile that he could make. Sarah walks back up to me and interlaces her fingers with mine.

"I'm going to get Chuck back, my Chuck," she says softly as she kisses me on the cheek and lets go of my hands and leaves. I walk back inside to have dinner with Ellie and Devon.

"Where's Sarah?" Ellie asks looking very worried.

"She went home. She looked sick," I respond as I sit down and start to eat. She didn't look sick, well maybe lovesick, but she looked as great as I remembered.

"If there is anything I know, it's the heart. You two love each other!" Devon says in his awesome voice.

"How could you?" Ellie acts astonished. "You broke her heart! My brother would never do that to a woman! Who are you?" Ellie is now fuming with anger.

"She is just a friend. I'm going to eat in my room," I take the plate off the table and walk into my room. I honestly didn't want to talk about Agent Walker. She is part of my past and I am doing fine now, I think.

I spent the rest of the night thinking about Agent Walker. She looked very good in that dress. I think I've seen it before, but it looked amazing on her. It fully accentuated her curves and wrapped around her shoulders perfectly.

I would have liked to feel her soft, luscious skin, but that is unprofessional. She is a colleague; that is it. She seemed very miserable. I hope I didn't bring any harm to her. She seemed quite compromised. I hope she recovers so she can help preserve this country.

**/**

**I've been getting some good suggestions through reviews. Please keep them coming. This is mostly to scratch my angst itch that made the first three seasons so dramatically awesome.**


	8. Chuck Vs The Betrayal

**I need to give major props to the writers of any TV show, Chuck in specific. Just writing a story is so difficult because you need to try to use an original idea each time and they run out fast, especially with only one writer. I do not own Chuck and don't think I could make such a great TV series.**

**/**

"General, Agent Walker has surfaced and may be a liability to the asset," Forrest explains to Beckman the next morning.

"I knew she was going to show herself," Beckman looks like she has a devious plan. "Detain Agent Walker using any means necessary." Beckman stresses the seriousness of the situation.

"Should I inform Major Casey of the assignment?" Forrest is determined to cover all her bases.

"No! He cannot be trusted to comply with my order," Beckman knows that Casey has grown feelings for his partners over the years, even if he doesn't show it.

Forrest nods in acceptance. Beckman ends the transmission and Forrest searches for where Sarah may be.

**/**

"Yogurt time," Casey lays his hand on my shoulder as I follow him out of the Buymore. We are walking through the parking lot and he stops suddenly.

"Snap of it!" Casey smacks me across the face in the middle of the parking lot.

"I don't know what I did to deserve that, Major Casey," I feel like I must have done something wrong, so I accept it.

"Or I will kill you personally!" he threatens me, sounding angrier than before.

"Beckman would not agree with your decision," I respond professionally.

"Dammit! Don't you see, moron? She is willing to give up everything for you!"

"I am now a spy of the CIA. I devoted my life to the protection of this nation," my voice is plain and monotone.

"What is wrong with you, Bartowski?" Casey looks like he wants to put a bullet into my skull. Possibly, first my kneecaps, then my arms, and finish with my head. "Even I'm not stupid enough to deny that!"

"What is my next mission?" I try to change the subject because I don't want to think about Sarah, Agent Walker. It is wrong to think of her in a non-professional way.

"I'm not assigning you another mission until you talk to Walker!" Casey is putting his foot down because he is sick of me being a lifeless machine along with all my friends and family; and Sarah.

"Beckman will override your order," I feel it is necessary to stay reluctant to Casey's threats.

"What the hell is it going to take?" Casey yells at my face as he grabs my arm and drags me into Castle. "I'm going to give you a taste of your own medicine," Casey responds while dragging me through Orange Orange.

Casey angrily starts fiddling with the computer keyboard. He opens a saved video from Ellie, Devon, and my apartment. The date logs as yesterday at 4 pm.

**/**

I watch as Ellie lets Sarah into our home. Sarah talks to Ellie and Devon about me.

"_You need to fix Chuck!" _Ellie pleads to Sarah._ "He is like a robot that eats, sleeps, and works!"_

"_I want to fix him. He fixed me when I was broken. Now it is my turn to return the favor!" _I think of the night on the beach that I opened up to her, one of the greatest times of my old life. She looked so sad before I said that. She was so sweet and nice. I feel very guilty for everything that has happened since.

"_Chuck has been very down lately. I think he needs you_," Devon said, while I notice how everyone is hurting because of my transformation.

"_We need to make you look amazing_," Ellie wants me to be amazed and shocked by Sarah's appearance. Possibly, to turn me back to my old, compromised self.

"_I don't really have any clothes here," _Sarah looks embarrassed and depressed. I kind of want to reach out and hug her.

"_Come with me," _Ellie stands up off the couch as Sarah follows her._ "I think I have some dresses that may fit."_ Sarah really cares for me. Why would she go through all this trouble when she broke my heart already?

They step out of the camera's vision towards Ellie's room.

**/**

Forrest arrives at Sarah's hotel. She walks in and figures out what room number and makes her way to the room. She knocks calmly. Sarah peeks through the peep hole and doesn't recognize her. Sarah slides a gun behind her back and opens the door slightly.

"Can I help you?" Sarah asks kindly.

"Yes, Agent Walker. You need to come with me," Forrest responds professionally. Sarah is startled, but she has trained to not show it.

"How do you know who I am?" Sarah asks judgingly.

"I am here under General Beckman's orders," Forrest pulls out a tranquilizer gun and aims it at Sarah.

Sarah narrows her eyes and reaches for her gun, but is tranquilized first. She feels the gun in her hand get heavy and she struggles to hold herself up. Her knees give way and Forrest catches her before she falls.

**/**

I cannot help but think about the real first date I went on with Sarah. She didn't even bring a gun. That was very unprofessional. It was supposed to be a real date though, not a cover date. She took it to heart when I asked her to have a real date. I put both of us in danger and I won't do that again.

Casey plays another archived video from one of his bugs. It is of the Buymore.

**/**

The annual Christmas party that we have at the Buymore is playing. I am talking with Sarah. She looks so genuinely happy. She is smiling and dancing. I am smiling and dancing. I haven't smiled in what feels like years. Neither have I danced. She always brought out the best in me.

**/**

"Do you see what you have done, moron?" Casey is annoyed and knows this has to be done. Casey grunts and puts on another video of the courtyard outside my apartment.

**/**

"_Chuck!"_ Morgan tries to surprise me, but I stand there without acknowledging he is there.

"_I'm sorry, I cannot talk right now. Ellie expects me for dinner,"_ my response is cold.

"_Dude! Come on! You're making me depressed!"_ I study my lifeless, emotional movements. _"I feel more depressed that you are actually making me depressed!"_

"_I'm sorry, but I need to go,"_ He used to be my best friend. I was really acting like an asshole to him.

"_Dude! Can I at least come over for dinner?"_ His puppy-dog look didn't faze me at all. It used to work so well.

"_I am sorry, but Ellie told me to come alone,"_ My voice is still ice cold and monotone, almost like I don't care for him at all.

"_I'll catch you on the flipside,"_ I see Morgan's head drop in shame and sadness. I feel bad for him. How did I not see that earlier?

I watch myself as I walk to my apartment like the conversation never happened. I cannot believe I did such a horrible thing.

**/**

Casey fast-forwards the video and plays it when Sarah takes me outside to talk. We are all alone and she looks very depressed.

"_What did they do?" _She looks so sad. _"This is all my fault!"_ She cries out as she lays her forehead against my chest.

"_I am fine, Agent Walker,"_ I cannot believe I was so cold to her. She needs my help and I just neglected it. I never called her Agent Walker before the transformation.

"_I didn't mean what I told you earlier. I do love you!" _She just told me she loves me. She never said that before. It takes me becoming a complete machine for her to say this. _"I was forced to lie! I want to be with you!"_ She was forced to lie? Who would do such a sadistic thing to someone?

"_You are compromising yourself, Agent Walker,"_ I just blew her off after she told me she loves me? I would never had done that before.

"_Come back to me, Chuck. Please…"_ She looks so sorry and wants to be with me.

"_Spies don't say please,"_ I explained coldly. I feel horrible for saying such harmful words to her. She always made me promise that I wouldn't change, but look at me now. I am a totally different person. _"You are acting unprofessional right now. What is your current mission?"_

How could I be so cold? I shut her down completely. She was reaching out to me how I reached out to her. Is this really who I become? I feel like I'm watching a different person in my body.

"Have I really been this negligible to the people I lo, lo, uh, like?" I just couldn't say the word love. Love, love, love! I can say it in my head so easily. Why can't I say it out loud?

"Yes, moron!" Casey is tired of trying to convince me. He is angry and annoyed.

"I'm sorry, but the security of this nation is more important," my newer personality takes over my old one again.

"Dammit Bartowski! I'm out of ideas!" Casey is not someone who quits easily. "Do I need to beat the old Chuck back?"

"Calm down, big guy. That will not be necessary. I am no longer compromised," I feel like I am split between two personalities. I try to joke but it seems so irregular and wrong.

Casey grunts knowing I am trying but it isn't enough. At that instance, the door to Castle opens and Forrest walks in with Sarah over her shoulder. Sarah looks lifeless and limp.

"What the hell is this?" Casey is confused and he doesn't like not knowing everything.

"Sarah?" I whisper to myself.

"You both shouldn't be here right now," Forrest stresses, while struggling to carry the body down the steps.

"Release Agent Walker right now!" Casey doesn't like one of the few people he trusts to be harmed.

"My mission is to detain Agent Walker," Forrest explains, which just angers Casey more.

"Under whose authority?" Casey growls.

"General Beckman." Casey grunts loudly thinking how Beckman could betray one of her top agents.

"I will take over from here," Casey steps up to take Walker's limp body.

"I cannot do that," Forrest tries to avoid Casey, which is hard when she is carrying a body over her shoulder.

"Is, is she dead?" My heart actually drops and my voice sounds fearful and sad. I feel like this is the most emotion I've shown in weeks. I am a spy! I don't have emotions! I try to tell myself.

"She is asleep. I am placing her in a cell," Forrest's voice is as cold as ice, with some bitterness too. "She is a liability to the asset."

"She is an asset to the asset!" Casey draws his gun and aims it at Forrest. "You will put her down right here!" Casey points to a chair and Forrest cannot do anything but comply.

"Beckman will not be satisfied with my failure," Forrest warns but Casey doesn't care. I walk up to Sarah and check her pulse.

"What did you do to her?" I almost yell in pain and frustration. I am actually showing some emotion. This is hazardous to the preservation of this nation. This is what I want, though. I want to be with her.

"I used a midnight dart," Forrest explains professionally. I immediately flash, thinking about Sarah's safety. I see the components and ingredients of the sedative, the effects (which include unconsciousness that lasts for thirty minutes), that it has no long-term effects, and the perfect uses for it.

I actually grunt as I get some water and a wet towel and bring it by Sarah's side. I think Casey is smiling, but I didn't actually look, I only stole a glance.

"You take care of Walker. I got Forrest," Casey informs me as he pulls out handcuffs in his free hand. He handcuffs Forrest and takes her to the cells within Castle.

"Sarah?" I ask softly, trying not to startle her. I lay the wet towel over her forehead and hold her hand. I think of how unprofessional this is, but I lo, lo, like this woman. No, I LOVE this woman! I drop my head in hope that she will be fine.

"Ch-Chuck?" I hear her voice whimper softly. I look up quickly to see her beautiful face. She is slightly smiling, with drowsy eyes. She probably isn't fully aware of her surroundings.

I hug her knowing how wrong it is, but it feels so right. She weakly hugs back, not gaining all her strength back from the tranquilizer effect.

"I am so sorry! I acted like an idiot!" I hold her tightly as I feel her grip get tighter.

"No, Chuck. I'm sorry! Beckman forced me to lie. She threatened to burn me," Sarah cries out in forgiveness.

"It is alright," I assure her.

"No, it isn't. Look what I did to you! I changed you and now you'll never be the same!"

"I will always be there for you," I try to assure her again.

"I don't care if I get burned anymore. As long as I'm with you," Sarah confesses painfully because all she had was her job before me. Then she was forced to lose me and only have her job. Now that she has me, she doesn't need the job.

"I want you to be a spy. You are the best spy I have ever met, but don't tell Casey," I joke to lighten the situation.

"What about me?" Casey asks from around a corner.

"Nothing, nothing," I try to diffuse his question. Sarah gets a good laugh out of it and I kiss her on the lips. I missed those lips. How they stretch when she smiles and laughs. She could light up a city with her smile.

"Are you finally back to your geeky self?" Casey asks after grunting at the sight of us kissing.

"You know, we prefer the term: nerd," I joke to show that I am back. Casey just grunts in satisfaction.

"I wonder how this is going to go with Beckman." Sarah asks cheekily.

"I refuse to let Beckman ruin our lives again," I am angry with her for everything she has done.

Beckman's face materializes on the computer screen suddenly.

"Speak of the devil," I mumble as she sees Sarah in my arms.

"What is going on here?" She sounds furious.

"Destiny," I jokingly whisper, although I'm very angry.

"Why is she not detained?"

"Am I that expendable to you?" Sarah demands the truth from Beckman.

"I needed the Intersect to work," Beckman defends her decision.

"Well, Chuck would have been fine if you would have let us be together in the first place!"

"I didn't realize you had compromised yourself with the asset."

"You're lucky you are not here in person," Sarah wants to brutally murder Beckman for being so naïve. I look at her. She is filled with determination, rage, and sorrow.

"The asset has performed well since your departure."

"You know I'm right here? I have a name," I am tired of being called the asset or intersect. I am a person after all, right? Sarah steals a glance at me to see how I am doing.

"I'm sorry I have to do this, Agent Walker. You are one of my best agents and this isn't easy to do," Beckman confesses actually showing a little sadness in her voice. This is a new page from Beckman. I am scared to know what she is going to do though.

"Apprehend Agent Walker!" Beckman states coldly over the feed. I almost laugh thinking that all three of us are not going to betray our partner/friend. I hear a gun cock and look behind us. Agent Forrest is standing there with a real handgun aimed at us. I swallow loudly in fear for our lives.

**/**

**I left it at a bit of a cliffhanger. I think the last chapter will be the next one unless I can fill it with enough fluff or BS to make it into two chapters. It depends on if you want a happy ending or a sad ending and if you want any fluff. Review me your ideas and such. Thanks for reading.**


	9. Chuck Vs The Return

**I do not own Chuck. I got some good reviews. Kopier, your idea of Chuck being shot to protect Sarah was actually one of my thoughts of how to end it. I don't think I can use it now, though. Kkalyk327, what isn't a cliché happy ending? I'll try not to let them go riding off into the sunset together on a horse, if that is what you mean. Just kidding.**

**/**

"How…?" I am flabbergasted that she escaped from the cell.

"Don't even think about it Major Casey!" Forrest warns Casey, knowing how his mind works because both of their minds work so alike.

"Well, it's hard not to think about it now," I let slip out trying to calm myself with a joke.

Casey reluctantly drops his gun to the ground and kicks it towards Forrest. Sarah didn't have a gun on her because she was off-duty while in Burbank. I am not quite smart enough to carry a gun with me at all times. We all stand there with our arms raised. Casey looks annoyed and angry. Sarah looks tired and furious. I am about to make a girly scream in fear. Sarah steps in front of me to protect me.

"Don't worry," I whisper to her and step in front of her. I need to step up and be a man; Sarah's man. I step in front of her knowing Forrest won't shoot at me. Sarah looks a little shocked, but grateful and happy. She knows I am right. I am too important to harm.

"I'm not letting you shoot anyone!" I tell Forrest with full determination.

"That is only a last resort," Forrest explains while motioning for us to go to a cell.

"How could you do this?" I ask Beckman through the conference feed.

"I did what was necessary," Beckman defends her decision. "Take them into the cell." Forrest tries to force us into the cell.

"I'm not going anywhere!" I know there is no way she would shoot me. This is the perfect opportunity to show my bravery to Sarah and Casey. I walk towards Forrest carefully. I don't know if I can trust her to not shoot at Casey or Sarah to threaten me.

"Chuck?" Sarah asks confused by what I am doing. She sounds fearful.

"Don't freak out," I whisper to her as I continue to close the gap between Forrest and I.

"Bartowski! You are disobeying a direct order!" I hear Beckman yelling at me, but I tune it out. After everything she has done to me, how could I not? I creep closer. I can barely hear Beckman anymore. "Chuck!" she yells my name a few times, but I don't care.

I step closer and closer until I am less than five feet away. "Take him out," Beckman orders with some aggravation in her voice. Does that mean I am about to be shot? I am now scared what Beckman means by that. I cannot give up now.

I lay my hand upon Forrest's armed handgun. Please don't blow my finger off like Jim Carrey in Me, Myself, and Irene. That is all I could think about as my thumb lays against the barrel. Forrest immediately knocks my hand down with her free hand. I cower in fear and instinctually throw a punch. Forrest grabs my arm, pulls it over her shoulder and elbows me in the teeth.

"Chuck!" I hear Sarah yell as the butt end of Forrest's pistol smacks me in the cheek. I fall to the ground barely conscious. At least I didn't lose my thumb.

I feel my blood boil as Sarah drops to her knees to my aid. She lays my head over her lap and whispers softly, "Chuck. Please be okay." I cannot help to spit up a little blood and a tooth. Sarah acts so nonchalant about a tooth and blood. She wipes the blood away like it was no problem at all.

I look up at her. She is so beautiful. I cannot help to think this is a good situation if I am staring her in the eyes. Her eyes are red and teary. She looks so sad.

"What's wrong?" I ask sincerely, not realizing how much it hurts to open my mouth. She cannot help but smile at my pathetic try at consoling her. I'm the one who needs to be consoled. I just couldn't help myself. I love to see her smiling.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Sarah asks frustrated at Forrest.

"Get in the cell," Forrest stays calm and collected, with just a hint of annoyance in her voice.

The cell door closes and we are all locked in. It is not very roomy. There is only a bench on both sides. I wonder when I'm thrown into a bunker, if I could get a nice two bed, two bath bunker. Jokes may be the only thing keeping me from going insane right now. I feel very disappointed that I finally have Sarah back and we're stuck in a damn jail cell. We all feel a little depressed, but mostly betrayed and furious that we are trapped.

"Are you alright?" Sarah asks me sincerely and worried.

"Yea… Obviously not my smartest plan," Sarah hugs me deeply. I feel so relieved to have Sarah back. Casey grunts, looking at the sight of us hugging intensely. It just is never this passionate without a Casey grunt of disgust. "I guess that was what Beckman meant by 'take him out.'"

"Thank you for bringing him back," Sarah thanks Casey sincerely. I wonder what she's thinking, possibly a way out of here or how the rest of her life is going to go. She was never someone who planned that far ahead though.

"A bit pointless now. We'll probably be locked up for treason and he'll be thrown into a bunker for the rest of our lives," Casey sends chills down my body. I think that I will never let them use me again if they do that.

"Thanks for lightening the mood," I joke, knowing it is the only way to deny my depression, although I feel it is inevitable.

Casey grunts at my joke and explains to Sarah, "Plus, I didn't do it for you. I did it to keep my sanity," Casey would never admit to helping someone in such a manner.

"A bit of a matchmaker, wouldn't you say?" I joke to Sarah. She smiles and makes our situation feel like a dream for those few seconds before I am thrown back into reality. Casey grunts loudly and I cannot help but think that makes it more hilarious.

"I'll kill you, Bartowski!" Casey threatens in embarrassment of having human feelings, although it is a pointless threat.

"I wish there was a way out of here," Sarah says under her breath.

"Well, I did read the manual," I joke hopefully. Sarah and Casey both look at me in unison. I honestly don't know if I'll be able to get us out of her. I might have just made Sarah and Casey angrier for giving them false hope. "I think ther—"

"I'm sorry I had to detain you, but I cannot let the asset be compromised," Beckman's voice over the P.A. system cuts me off.

"Can you hear us?" I ask sheepishly.

"Yes, Bartowski!" Beckman's answer is fierce.

"Why are you doing this?" I ask not even sure what I am talking about specifically. Either the whole locking us up or not letting me be with Sarah; maybe even both.

"I need you to work at full capacity," Beckman explains over the system.

"I will work fine as long as you let me be with Sarah!" I yell back in annoyance and hope. "I was doing my job perfectly well, before you forced her to leave!" I'm not sure if she can see us, so I look around, talking to the ceiling.

"I will not have my agents consort with each other!" Beckman tries to clear the air. I just think: Wow, she called me an agent.

"I don't see why we can't," Sarah thinks out loud.

"It causes you to not think like a spy when you need to," Beckman explains.

"It can also be beneficial to have a personal relationship," I inform Beckman.

"How so?" Beckman just wants to be amused.

"Well, Sarah helped me land the helicopter when Zarnow kidnapped me," I suggest awkwardly. I didn't think about it, but that was only like my third day of knowing Sarah. Even though I knew from the first sight, she was the perfect woman.

"You only knew each other for a few days!" Beckman's patience is being tested.

"Uh, Morgan distracted Colt so I could steal the cipher," I think of the first mission that popped in my head.

"If I'm not mistaken, you were then dropped off a rooftop," Beckman scoffs. I kind of left that part out on purpose. Damn, she has one hell of a memory.

"Ok, fair enough. But what about when I found the counterfeit plates that Lon Kirk was making?" I feel like this is the one. "If Morgan wasn't my best friend, then I would have never noticed the crate from the picture he sent me," I try to act confident.

There is pure silence over the P.A. system. I look at Sarah, who looks very hopeful. Casey just looks annoyed like usual.

"Oh and if I didn't save Sarah and Casey from the Triads, then they could have endangered this nation!" I only really went back because I was already in love with Sarah and Casey has grown to be a friend, of sorts. "I even got Mei-Ling to defect and give us some of her government's secrets," I feel like I have satisfied my position and am ready for Beckman's response.

"Those missions didn't go according to plan, but you were ultimately successful," Beckman says through clenched teeth. I can tell she just admitted that I am right without her saying it directly.

"Does that mean yes?" I ask high-pitched and almost giddy.

"I cannot believe I am going to say this," Beckman reluctantly states. I just keep saying yes over and over in my head. "You will comply with my rules," Beckman agrees without saying yes.

Sarah kisses me on the lips passionately and hard. I cannot help but smile for what seems like the first time in forever.

"Forrest will stay to evaluate your relationship to make sure it doesn't hinder your abilities," Beckman starts laying down the law; Beckman's law.

"That sounds reasonable," I show my approval.

"Anything that gets me out of this cell is reasonable," Casey says under his breath and grunts to finish it off.

The doors slide open. I feel relieved that Sarah gets to stay as my handler.

"Well, we got team Bartowski back!" I cheer happily. Sarah smiles as Casey grunts in annoyance. I can just imagine him thinking, great I got to deal with the nerd again. Although he did help me get out of my funk.

I hold Sarah tight, never wanting to release her. We walk to the center of Castle, accidentally startling Agent Forrest. She pulls out her handgun and aims it at us.

"Freeze!" Forrest shrieks.

"Whoa!" I jump in fear. We all stop dead in our tracks. "Beckman just released us," I explain as coherently as possible.

"I wasn't informed," Forrest stays persistent.

"You would be dead if I escaped," Casey informs in almost a threat to convince her to lower her weapon.

"Stand down, Agent Forrest," Beckman's face appears on the screen.

"Yes, ma'am," Forrest complies and after a brief pause, lowers her weapon.

"That was close," I exhale tiredly.

"You will stay to assess the situation with the asset until I deem it unnecessary," Beckman explains to Forrest. I still dislike being called the asset or the Intersect. At least Casey calls me Bartowski, like Big Mike does.

"Yes, ma'am," Forrest complies and Beckman's face dematerializes. Forrest turns around to face the three of us. "I am sorry for the face," she actually sounds a little sympathetic. I actually haven't seen how bad it looks yet.

"No problem, just doing your mission," I cannot be angry with her, even though she did kidnap Sarah.

"I am sorry for taking you against your will," Forrest wants to clear any bad blood that may have brewed between anyone. I actually am afraid Sarah might not forgive her for hitting me or kidnapping her.

"I understand," she says simply, but sincerely.

"So… do you go by the name Forrest or Alex?" I ask, trying to lighten the mood.

"Well, I like Forrest more," she decides, wanting to keep it professional; like Casey.

"Sounds good to me. It is a pleasure to work with you, Forrest," I shake her hand formally as she shakes Sarah and Casey's hands after mine.

**/**

I step into the front door of my apartment with Sarah under my arm. Ellie is standing in the kitchen area, making dinner.

"Ellie, I am back to normal," I sheepishly state. "At least as normal as I'll ever get," I joke happily.

"Oh my god! I knew you would get my brother back!" Ellie sprints towards us. She hugs us both aggressively. "It is so nice to have my brother back!"

"It's nice to be back," I revel in the happiness Ellie is exuding. Devon walks in, not quite sure of the reason for us hugging.

"Group hug?" He asks rhetorically. He joins in and hugs all of us for a second before letting go. "Awesome…" He lets out as he steps into his room to change out of his scrubs.

"There is one last person I need to talk to," I say knowing how much I must have hurt him. Ellie finally releases us from her clutches.

"Go ahead," she reluctantly, but happily says. She knows who I am going to see. "I got some catching up to do with Sarah. For starters, I would like my dress back," Ellie asked in a joking manner.

"Oh, yea," Sarah actually looked a little embarrassed.

"Thank you," I say to Ellie as I kiss Sarah on the lips and run out the door.

**/**

"Morgan!" I yell as I step into the Buymore. I look around for him. I see him with a costumer. I sprint to him and grab him by his underarms and lift him.

"Morgan, I missed you so much, buddy!" I happily confess before putting him down.

"What?" He looks stunned by my over-excitement.

"I'm sorry," I state to the costumer as I look back at Morgan. "I am down to play Call of Duty anytime!"

"Did you get back with Sarah?" Morgan asks, while straightening his Buymore polo. He is still confused.

"Yes, and I am sorry for being such a douche lately," I confess with love and happiness.

"Well, douche is a strong word," Morgan always gets my back, even if I am besmirching myself.

"No, not strong enough, but I am back and I just had to say sorry to my best friend in the world," I joke happily. "You're coming over for dinner tonight. Ellie is making her your favorite, meatloaf!" Morgan smiles happily as I turn around to leave.

"Where are you going?" Morgan asks.

"There is one more thing left to do," I state confidently. I leave the Buymore in a hurry.

**/**

I get back home. Sarah is talking with Ellie on the couch. They are probably talking about me. I can just imagine it being Ellie graciously saying thank you to Sarah. Then, Sarah says how much she loves me and loves her. At least that is how it is going in my mind. I'd rather not interrupt them but I have to.

I step through the door, feeling like Superman. Ellie and Sarah both look at me happily. "I'm sorry sis, but I need to borrow Sarah for a little while," I hint a tone of seduction, but not enough to make it obvious. Sarah looks at me with soft, passionate eyes. A smile is growing on her face. I slide my hands under her and lift her into my arms.

"Stop it!" She cries in laughter. I know she doesn't want me to stop. "Let me down!" she cannot help but laugh more.

I carry her through the hallway and into my room. As I get us both inside, I kick the door closed and lay her across the bed. I cannot miss this opportunity of having control of Sarah Walker. I lay right next to her, so she can feel the heat emanating from my happiness.

I place my head directly over hers and sneak forward until my lips crash against hers. She accepts the feeling as the kiss becomes more passionate by the second. I release the kiss to say, "I've always wanted to do this." I immediately go back to kissing her.

I start to slide my hands against her back and hold her close to me. She releases the kiss this time and says, "That is such a Chuck thing." She smiles in unison with my smile as our lips press against each others again.

Sarah's legs slowly wrap around my waist as we get more intimate and passionate. My hands start vigorously sliding around her whole body from thighs to neck. I just think…

**/**

This is the best day of my life.

**/**

**Thank you for reading my story. I didn't expect it to be more than the second chapter, but I feel I did alright. It was similar to the third season of Chuck in the way they were asked to do another six after finishing the first 13. I hope the ending was good enough for all you fiendish Chuck fans, just kidding. I hope the ending wasn't too cliché for you, Kkalyk327.**

**Thank you, and please review so I feel awesome inside.**


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